My first post after using EA for 15 years

[CamelbyCamel]

I haven't searched for EA since it shut down, until today when I suddenly had the idea. Greetings from Sydney.
I had the idea that I didn't want any sexual organs when I was about 4 years old. I also remember when I was 9 years old, I went swimming and saw the adults around me with their bodies naked. I imagined that their penises had been turned into fried sausages XD.
I first learned about EA from Tumblr before I entered 7th grade. I never posted but I read a lot of novels and read the posts from users here, and realized that I wasn't actually that strange and a lot of people live with these thoughts their whole life.(Salute to the pioneers and it is against the rules for minors to use the forum,I'm sorry.)
As for my identity exploration, I just did various ordinary teen shits and felt that I was a regular bi man aside from wanna get rid of my dick.What's strange is that I have a strong sex drive, but the pleasure from it still not enough to erase my thoughts.
Undergraduate, I carry the wish with me. I was about my dumb youthful charm and sexual experiences like everyone else, mostly I topped but I couldn't help feeling like I'm just try to remind myself to keep them.I also tried to deal with it, using methods to suppress my sexdrive to somehow stop the idea, couldn't change anything.
And of course, not like there would be any supports or discussions since no one would think a man wanting to cut off his dick,it's impossible to bring it up even in LGBTQ+ community because it's not aligned somehow, you know. I did check some other users and forums on social media, but I feel that my need has nothing to do with kinks so I just step back.
Under the guise of travel, I became a nullo when I'm 24, in an asian country, glad it's not a scam.
However, two years have passed since then, and in these two years I haven't had any intimate relationship, sexual activities, nor have I shown anything to anyone. I look like any other guys, just work, exercise, socialize, except at parties when they really approach me, I just joke, smile, dodge and back away.
I actually feel great about my body right now, but it's not the kind of feeling I want to tell the whole world. And I'm perfectly fine with my identity as male.I'm just enjoying this peace now.
I want to move forward, but I don't know how my 'manly' ways will work and how would they react.Perhaps I'll start dating, I do wanna be intimate with others, and I think about family more after 25, I don't know what all of these will be like.This is my first post, and I think it's the perfect place to express it here.
Thanks to everyone who worked hard to bring it back.

[T van Keel]

Hi,

Welcome to the EAv3. Your story sounds quite familiar to me, except the sexual experience with other people. Today I'm also a bit hesitant about telling others that I'm a nullo. I also would like to have a family, but I still didn't manage to meet a female partner.

Congratulations on reaching your goals. It shows that access to nullification is getting easier. I wish I could have become a nullo at young age, too, but it wasn't possible in those days.

Feel free to contact me in case you want to ask something.

TvK

[CamelbyCamel]

Hi,

Welcome to the EAv3. Your story sounds quite familiar to me, except the sexual experience with other people. Today I'm also a bit hesitant about telling others that I'm a nullo. I also would like to have a family, but I still didn't manage to meet a female partner.

Congratulations on reaching your goals. It shows that access to nullification is getting easier. I wish I could have become a nullo at young age, too, but it wasn't possible in those days.

Feel free to contact me in case you want to ask something.

TvK

Hi TvK, thanks for the reply. I definitely feel that it has become much more prevalent on social media,seems like people all over the world have found a way to complete the procedure.
About have it done at a young age, well, idk.. As a young guy, whether my dick was there or not, it's like 2 different feelings of I'm not fitting in deep down.And I do think about if I haven't throw my wang and beans what would it be like, sometimes I feel bad about my big buddies once down there but mostly I feel great looool.

[T van Keel]

Definitely, the topic is much more visible today. Back in the 1990s, there was absolutely no information available, which made my way very long.

Having the genitals voluntarily removed is sometimes a very, very weird thought, but at the same time it feels absolutely normal to me. Simply no doubts and my life definitely improved a lot after nullification. There was always a subtle feeling that I didn't want to have the parts down there, even as a child. But I also didn't want to be female. Today I would identify as somewhere in the male non-binary range.

Regarding age, I meant your age of about 24, maybe some years younger. That would have been perfect for me, as I already had a very strong interest in becoming a nullo at this point. But there was simply no possibility to get the procedure.

[WheelyFixed]

Welcome to the world of forum posters, glad to have you aboard... You won't get any problems for using the old site as a minor now that you are of age, and I can say that you aren't the only minor user I've heard about... (all that I will say about that person)

I'm not a nullo and don't want to be for 'mechanical reasons' (it's easier to cath when you have a more accessible hose insertion point ) but I can somewhat relate in that I don't really want to 'advertise' my being a eunuch, but miss the close relationship I had w/ my late GF, and would sort of like to find a new partner - but not wanting to tell is a definite concern, though being disabled is a bigger one that I can't hide...

WheelyFixed