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It was her idea, honestly.

Anyway, never enjoyed or was a real "go-get-her".

I must say that I can identify and empathize with BadBob's explanation perhaps more than any other so far. I think everyone's interest in the fetish is a little different and derives from their own unique reasons and experiences. I don't think my own fascination with castration can be narrowed or isolated to any one cause. I think it is many-faceted. Years ago, when I first started analyzing my own infatuation with the subject, I was actually hoping I could, as BadBob said, "analyze it out of existence." I believed it to be unnatural and unhealthy, and thought if I could determine the root cause I could be "cured." Since then, I have learned it isn't nearly so simple.

Twenty years ago (I was 35), I too, would have vehemently asserted that my interest in castration was strictly fantasy and that I would never want it to happen in real life (except that, at that time, no one else knew of it). But the fetish is something that creeps up on you over the years. It stalks you like some dark specter from your dreams or your subconscious, growing stronger, asserting its will. If you have the fantasy, then the thing surely lives in you. (Perhaps it lies at core of all men's souls - at once their greatest dread and their greatest desire.) All it needs is a fertile environment to manifest itself and grow.

Most people who have castration fantasies have some set of circumstances - a scene or scenario - where their fantasy castration takes place. I believe the closer the real-life conditions emulate the conditions of the fantasy, the more likely we are to succumb to the fetish and become a life-styler.

For instance: if I lived in a very rough, macho-man environment, perhaps working on an off-shore oil rig or in a logging camp, I would have no desire to lose my balls. I would probably look on it with the same horror as I did when I was sixteen. However, if I lived in a very cultured peaceful society, generally free of conflict; quasi-matriarchal, where women ran around in public in sexy lingerie, and I had a special woman who desired me as her eunuch, I could easily succumb to her (and my) wishes. If eunuch companions or spouses were commonplace in such a society, it would practically be a given that becoming serious with a woman would, lead to my eunuchhood.

It would be no fun to be a eunuch in prison, or a homeless eunuch. But if I were reasonably affluent and lived in a cultured civilized environment (perhaps earning my livelihood in the arts), then my fetish would certainly manifest itself in reality. Others, no doubt, have entirely different scenarios.

Farrell

I like the subject because I have a fascination with being worked over hard and submitting to this ordeal, and being dominated so that Master decides whether I lose them or not.

i love my wife and i need to be "with her " in mind and body.

she no longer has the desire tohave frequent intercourse , but i cant stop thinking about it . it is consuming my every thought and messing with my progress as a human . i have just stopped progressing , i need to go foward with my life and castration is the only thing that will allow me to be free of this idle and all consuming mindset.

i still want to have sex but i don't want my balls in control any more . i want to control my own life, i guess i have too much testosterone. i can have sex four times a day and sometimes i am not soothed. so this is something i have to do . i have been thinking this for many years now. i want my life . and my wife and this will bring us closer together . she has finally started talking with me about it, a really hard thing to do with your wife .

besides they get in my way all the time.

nolo,

Just read your reply as to why you want castration. I can relate to your situation. My wife and I are 60 & 62 and I am hoping that my castration will make our loving each other more relaxed and much beter

Kelly_2 (imported) wrote: Sun Dec 30, 2001 12:54 pm Awww, do you mean that if we had an op ourselves that we are not real women? You hurt my feelings.



And I thought that we were friends here.

Love (well, I guess not today)

Kelly

If this would not be true I would shut up.

But fact is that even trannies turn me on.

I like femininity. I want to fuck female person, trannie or not.

Especially very hot trannies who actually can't even be

called trannies anymore. You are a hot one.

In my imagination you have flabby sellulitic flesh at the sides

of your upper legs and it makes me fucking HOT

and you are SO feminine.

make my day and say you are at least a bit BI-sexual

getting hot in your face when near a hot man.

hope I didn't make a fool of myself, I mean, who wants to be

liked be me anyway.

btw. if somebody could get the previous message-board-systems

";p" smiley ,which was so cute, in here I would be glad.

that one with orange color and winking eye as if eating lemon

and tongue out.

I do however understand the dude wanting to hear of

woman-cutters who have not themselves underwent the

operation.

Men with castration-fantasies want to be cut by a woman who

is fertile because they love the feeling of being disqualified

as male reproducers by a woman who herself is able to reproduce. that is the thrill of it all.

so I believe trannies are not very wished as cutters.

but you don't mind because you don't care to cut anybody.

I still remember with laughter that funny letter you once wrote

couple of messageboard-versions ago:

"Rednecks say about trannies 'They oughta be castrated.'.

I answer 'Well thank you very much.'."



and I love that letter too where you said you get

angry if you drop your hat in the mud.

You are SO FUCKABLY FEMININE!!!!!!! :p

....so, tell us, what does she say?

Does she think that this is a good idea?

If you want it 4 X a day I suspect that you have some sort of problem. Man, even teenagers who are hormonally challenged don't want to fuck that much unless they have some sort of mental thing driving them to it.

"Here he goes again", the Eunuchs will say, but it I have seen people who are depressed treat themselves with a fanatical sex drive.

You really should think about therapy for you AND your wife. You should start separately and then gradually the therapist will tell you when they want to see both of you at the same time.

I mean, after all, you can always get castrated, if that is what you REALLY want.

Better think about it. Once you cut them off they won't ever grow back.

A-1

My interest in castration started as soon I knew about it. I have always felt that I was a girl in the wrong body. By aged 11 I just wanted to get rid of my testicles!

I went through dressing in female clothes whenever I could I that has continued into my adult life, the reasons why I want to be castrated first before M-F reassignment, I just don't know, somehow I feel though that this is a road that I must travel and something that I want to experience.

like Kelly I just wish I had done something about it when I was 14

spdd (imported) wrote: Thu Jan 17, 2002 8:19 am I still remember with laughter that funny letter you once wrote

couple of messageboard-versions ago:

"Rednecks say about trannies 'They oughta be castrated.'.

I answer 'Well thank you very much.'."



and I love that letter too where you said you get

angry if you drop your hat in the mud.

You are SO FUCKABLY FEMININE!!!!!!! :p

Wow. Thanks, dear. I like to hear things like that. I think that I like you a whole lot more than my old boyfriend

Love,

Kelly

I think a couple of things that happen today sum up why I want to for the Eunuch and SRS route.

1st My car broke down and cause massive traffic disruption, eventually help came from tow women who aided me in pushing my car on to the verge.

2nd Was in shop quietly browsing when a woman came up behind me tapped me on shoulder, I turned round and she said oh, sorry I thought that you was my sister! and that was when II was dressed in male attire!

Proof that I am in the wrong body?:)

Lovey (imported) wrote: Fri Dec 14, 2001 2:16 pm An inquiring mind wants to know: why do you visit this site?

Are you, like me, just curious about castration and would never, EVER, allow oneself to be "nutted"? (As you may well know, I have an unhealthy fascination with castration)

Or, are you hellbent on being a eunuch?

If that is the case-

Why?

I'm not here to ridicule you, it's just that I could never figure why someone would want to be an eunuch.

(or maybe you're an eunuch because fate played a cruel trick)

In fact, I don't know why I'm interested in castration.

Maybe by you telling me why your the way you are, I can get a better understanding why I visit this site.

Maybe. i have a small pee-pee and i love jacking at least 3 times a day but my thing has always beed to never get a hard on . i hate getting and seeing ahard on . now i've been told that by cutting off my nuts will give me what i've always wanted. i hate sex and have fetishes that im 100%into so i dont need sex to keep me happy. i love men and love beeing around them without having sex with them. so if loosing my nuts is what i need then i need it done . thanks

As I thought before it's interesting how "something" may turn out as it's complete opposite or at least have quite some aspects that way and if I sound too complicated yet just wait; It's going to get worse. *g

The fascination of beeing castrated looks as if someone hated his privates and yearning for somebody who would want to do it sounds paradox in a way that you seem to love beeing hated.

But that is only so on first glance.

On second one may notice that one important aspect here is the appreciation of youre beloved private parts as beeing important, as beeing special, as beeing something someone may LONG FOR.

If you put it this way around it's nothing very different than ol' penis worship.

And I assume that most males yearn for THAT, one way or another.

That way "submissive" or "dominant" are just two different ways to achive the same goal.

Beeing appreciated and longed for.

And then it's not a miracle that castration and penectomy HAS it's fascination to either of them.

Well, it has to me.

So this wasn't complicated at all, I'm surprised.

Friends, I've got to work much to much and too long also.

But I'm here every day and will be posting again and more and more complicated also, so watch out! *ggg

Gus

Castration has been for me something I want it to happen for the last 10 years of my life.

I´m divorce for the last 6 years and have a 15 years old son.

Look like my life is complete and now I do need this to make myself happy for once.

Is Dr. Spector or Dr. Kimmel the only ones that can go ahead with this?

I went to see Dr. Reed in Florida. They kick me out of the office when I mentioned to them what I was looking for.

I know that there is cutters that can do this job quick and easy, and no questions are asked, and I REALLY WANT TO GET IN TOUCH WITH ONE.Please, if anyone can help me out I will really thank you.

Nolo,

I'm in a similar situation. Wife and I have been talking about losing the testes. Please update us on how your discussion and decision are coming along

Personally, (SWM,44,never tattooed or pierced...), I have always had "gender issues", but have until recently not been able to admit it....wouldn't make a very "passable" girl anyway!

Although I'm hetero, I've always been attracted to TS/CD/Shemales....probably a reaction, or a way to BE HER vicariously.......

As some of you know, Finder's erotic high is the story/thought/image of one or more women doing things to his (or another man's) penis, preferably very erect and ready to ejaculate. Like Farrell S says, is it possible to analyze this all the way down to its roots and understand it? It's hard to do for him because the arousal component always gets in the way, have to be totally spent to look at it objectively.

Is this a clue? Finder's earliest true memory is this: his mother is changing his diapers (he's maybe 3 yrs old, had long time getting over night bedwetting) - he points to his penis and asks, "What's that, Mommy?" and she says, smiling, "That's your penis." Now I never did feel any kind of Eodipal thing if that's what you're thinking - but the memory is there.

Teenage fantasies were more like - being the only male left in some apocalyptic scenario and the girls in his high school class were sweetly cooperative in re-populating the world with him.

Married: "I want you to do things to my penis." She does not respond, probably anxious about where that will go. He seeks female doctors who might view his erection should he be fortunate enough to respond that way while being examined.

He frequents medical libraries, copying huge numbers of studies on the male anatomy, erection studies, surgery of the penis - shocked and aroused response to the deepest darkest treatment of all - removal! Someone actually takes a knife to the organ, cuts it off! It's very clinical but it's all true, he devours this.

He has a relationship on the side with a woman who will do anything, tell him stories of revenge and justice, penis is the focus of the story, ultimately removal the outcome, while she strokes his fierce erection, holds a knife on it. Stories from Bosnia and Thailand.

The Eunuch Archive and FemCan images connect him to the rest of this strange community. Yes he is unusual. No, he can't understand, in the end, why it's so arousing. It just is. He can write stories and someone else will appreciate them. And someone else writes stories for him. Aaahhhh that feels good.

Finder

I visit this site because I'm seriously considering castration. I'm a 47yo male, have been married 30 years, and have sired 3 sons. My male libido is so excessive that it controls my life. My wife is not interested in any sex and my sex drive is sky high. Thus, I have various multiple sex partners outside our marriage. My drive is so high it keeps me awake at night, interferes with my work, and is a constant wedge between my wife and I. I have talked with a surgeon that has agreed to do my castration and am still wrestling with decision as to whether or not being castrated is my only solution. I can't imagine what my life would be like without my balls and the constant need for sex 3 or 4 times a day. On the other hand I've been told that without my balls I would experience an immediate calmness and peacefulness in my life and that is what I so desparately seek. I do know I need to make my decision soon. Any input here, would like to hear from other men with the same libido delima.

davejohn8 (imported) wrote: Sun Mar 09, 2003 1:56 am I can't imagine what my life would be like without my balls and the constant need for sex 3 or 4 times a day. On the other hand I've been told that without my balls I would experience an immediate calmness and peacefulness in my life and that is what I so desparately seek.

It may not be an immediate calmness. Of all the aspects of Eunuch biology, this is one of the biggest YMWV (Your Milage Will Vary). But over time, yes, your sex drive will diminish, perhaps to the point of total nonsexuality. "The Eunuch Calm" also takes some time to develop, from several months to a couple of years.

But those of us who are elective eunuchs, and have come to enjoy this peaceful calm of a mind not obsessed with sex or masculine aggression, have no desire to go back or try testosterone replacement therapy (TRT).

I don't like the feelings of sexual maturity, the physical changes and needs. They interfere with what I really want to do, and frequently force me into situations I do not feel comfortable in. Simple sexual arousal is enough to make me want sex... enough to make me a person who wants sex, and frankly that's scary. I don't like being made into a different person. Thankfully it fades after fulfillment, at least for a little while.

polecat (imported) wrote: Wed Oct 06, 2004 5:03 am I don't like the feelings of sexual maturity, the physical changes and needs. They interfere with what I really want to do, and frequently force me into situations I do not feel comfortable in. Simple sexual arousal is enough to make me want sex... enough to make me a person who wants sex, and frankly that's scary. I don't like being made into a different person. Thankfully it fades after fulfillment, at least for a little while.

Well now! Welcome to adulthood.I agree with your analisis and it is bothersome.As a matter of fact,that is exactly the main criteria of this web site.You'll get lots of comments on this one.Hugs,Leona

Interesting coment polecat thats the way i felt about my life with testosterone you see it changed me into a person i didnt like anymore and i just couldent live that person anymore.So yes the changes were worth the problems i may face i am so happy now.

I served 20 years in the Miltiary and knew of men who got testicular cancer, sometimes both testicles were removed and they still stayed in. Why do you need your balls to be in the Service? Women serve in the US Miltiary just as men do, with exception to submarine and Navy SEAL Special Warfare. Guys were always talking about their Nads in the Navy.

Steve//

I was 15 when I realized that I am homosexual: a queer, a fairy. (The term "gay" wasn't used until the late 1950's.) I was horrified and as disgusted as the normal boys I knew would have been to know this about me. I was filled with self-loathing and considered suicide. Fortunately, I had always been a timid child and was much too much of a coward to take "the coward's way out." I did make a couple of half-hearted attempts, and one time, after failing again to carry it out, I said aloud "It's no use, I just don't have the balls to do it." Suddenly, I realized THAT'S IT ! If I didn't have balls, I wouldn't have any sex urge and I wouldn't need to worry about being queer. From then on, I was obsessed with the idea of being castrated. I read everything I could find, mostly in books on animal husbandry, about castration. At 18, I began asking doctors about having the operation done. None of them sympathized with my desire at all and most of them recommended that I see a psychiatrist. I have never accepted the fantasies and dogmas of the shrinks. I shall not dignify these ideas, especially Freud's obsession with Greek mythology, as theories and hypotheses. I definitely did not want these crackpots meddling with my psyche, lest one of them get the idea "to grasp this sorry scheme of things entire [i.e. my personality] and mould it closer to [his] heart's desire." I gradually came to terms with my homosexuality, though it took until my early 30's, but the desire to be castrated has never left me. Age has, finally, pretty much solved the problem, however.

Castration is the LAST thing I want. I would NEVER agree to be "nutted."

When I was about six or seven I had nightmares about being nullified. I remember one very vivid dream from the time I was that age. In this dream for some reason I had agreed to be nullified and I felt such incredable remorse that I had let "it" be taken from me. When I woke up I can't discribe the sense of relief when I found that it was still there.

Some people write about Vimpires and Ghoasts and monsters because that is what scares them.

I write about my nightmares not about my happy dreams.

Timothy