Hi from Colorado,
my pseudo name is Lee.

Long before I found the EA, for a time, I was chemically castrated and loved it. I was married to a former nymphomaniac, who I had thought was a perfect match for my hypersexuality until she outgrew it. Then I was just an annoyance. After years of celibacy and frustration, I castrated myself chemically (cyproterone) and loved it. Not only did I no longer feel frustrated, I liked how I behaved with her.

Now, years later, I would love to return to being asexual, but I can no longer get access to low cost cyproterone in the U.S. Apparently surgical is my only inexpensive option, but having just had bladder cancer, I'm under constant surveillance by my doctors, and my suddenly not having testicles would be noticed. Unfortunately there is such a stigma for being voluntarily castrated. I've been almost envying guys with prostate cancer getting to be castrated without the stigma.

Well, fate came to my rescue. Almost three years ago, I underwent 4 rounds of chemotherapy with Cisplatin, a chemo drug that is well known for testicular toxicity. In short, my testosterone has been declining ever since. It was probably around 620 ng/dL when I started chemo, now it was down in November to 478 ng/dL. I'm having another T test next week, and I expect it to be down even more.

I'm still above average (~380 ng/dL for my age, 81) but I was at about 90th percentile before chemo. At the current rate, I'll be low T in another year or so, and, as I said, no stigma attached, since I didn't knowingly do it to myself (I'm just happy it's happening).

My only concern now is how to I keep them from giving me TRT. I want to avoid some of the worst effects of no T, osteoporosis and type 2 diabetes, but I don't want to restore my libido.

Welcome to the forum, I'm glad you found us... We are definitely a 'stigma free zone' here, and don't think it's at all odd to be castrated...

I certainly was worried about stigma and negative reactions when I first started on the road to getting rid of my testicles a few years ago, so I understand your concerns. I was very pleasantly surprised about what I've actually experienced...

I don't know how things are in Colorado, but I can say that here in Mass. I get absolutely ZERO stigma or negative reaction from medical professionals (and I see a LOT of them because of the medical issues that go with my spinal cord injury), Mostly I either get no reaction if I'm not seeing them about a related issue, or a very professional one if it is related. My feeling is that if your doctors are giving you issues about your choices for care, it is time to find different doctors (and possibly file complaints w/ medical ethics boards)

Outside of the medical world where I feel that they have a real 'need to know' in order to provide appropriate care, very few people know, and I don't generally tell anyone. It is most unlikely that any one will guess either if you don't spend a lot of time hanging out in locker rooms and naturist camps as it does not show in an obvious way.... I have bigger boobs than average, but they don't particularly show if I have even a T-shirt on, and other than that there isn't anything obvious....

I already have bone issues due to my SCI so I must do some sort of hormone, and have chosen to go with estrogen since my desire to get rid of libido was a major driver in my decision to get fixed... It does just about everything that testosterone does, except make me horny... (although it is probably most of the reason for my boobs...)

If you are firm in your self advocacy it shouldn't be a big deal to not get testosterone hormone replacement. Remember that they can't do ANYTHING to you without your consent, so simply say I don't consent to testosterone, find an alternative, that you'd consider estrogen or SERMs and stick to your guns, tell the docs that if they can't / won't do it, to give you a referral to someone that can.... The doctors in transgender clinics have plenty of experience doing non-standard hormone therapies, so you might also try reaching out to them (they are also the folks that will deal with surgery if you go that way...

Good luck on your journey and don't be afraid to ask any questions you might have...

WheelyFixed