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Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Sat Jan 06, 2007 9:51 am
by Hash (imported)
I've been wondering when I got over or through my last fear of being castrated and then just did it. From what I've read on the board, most of us who finally took the step and got castrated, took our time before we did it. Some of us took years. Is this a natural progression of working through our fear(s)? If it is, do you remember the day, time and hour when you finally made the call to find someone to castrate you? I ask this in retrospect of my final hour, the date and time I said to myself, "What are you waiting for, do it, make the call." What got me over the hurdle of putting it off? Why did I finally say, "I'm going to get castrated as soon as I can!" I really want some answers, so you psychologists and philosophers tell me why.
There are several wannabe's who will take the plunge one of these days. One day they'll finally say to themselves, "I'm going to do it, today's the day!" And then they get castrated just like that, and wonder what all the fuss was about and why they ever waited so long. If you're a wannabe, one day something will click or something will change in your psyche and you won't be able to put it off any longer, you'll get castrated. I was a wannabe for a long time, but one day all my fears and inhibitions about getting castrated melted away. Will tomorrow be your day or time?
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Sun Jan 07, 2007 5:16 am
by tugon (imported)
Hash this is an interesting and thought provoking thread. First I want to say that for me I do not think the fear of being castrated was over until I was healed and did not have to worry about complications. You are right that there is a point when you know it is what you need and must have. Knowing the need came long before finding the way for me.
Thoughts of castration started out as a frighteningly erotic thought. Soon fantasy was becoming desire. Having these desires made me look at myself and wonder why this would be good for me. During the time of self discovery I realized I had no fear of being without testicles. I began to understand that I felt no pressure to be male. I did not want to be male.
The erotic thoughts of castration began in my early 20's and by my mid 30's I knew it had to be done. Another 5-6 years passed before I was able to find someone to castrate me. At 41 years of age they were removed. I had no fear of transitioning to eunuch but I had concerns about it being done by a cutter in a motel room. Luckily all went well.
At 50 years of age I am as convinced that I was meant to be a eunuch as I was in my mid 30's.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Mon Jan 08, 2007 6:13 am
by Kangan (imported)
As a wannabe eunuch of some 30+ years, I'd agree that the fear of something going wrong is what stops me from getting it done.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 1:51 pm
by penispain69 (imported)
I have thought of having a penectomy done but would want to keep my testicles. I am curious how many people have done this and how they orgasm. Not sure if I will ever have it done. I enjoy torturing my penis a lot and not sure if I want to lose that fun.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 9:41 pm
by Hash (imported)
Dear Penispain,
Like you, I tortured my testicles for several years, then one day I went past the point of no return, which is where you are headed. One day you will wake up and start to torture your penis and you will either injure it beyond the point of your normal routine, or you will destroy it or cut it off. Maybe next week, next month, next year, but you are on a slippery slope of eventually acting upon your fantasy. How do I know? I've been where you are and where a lot of others have been.
Fantasy can last a long time, but it seems that eventually we act out our fantasy. If you keep torturing your penis, one day you will go to far. Think very carefully about this and ask yourself if you could live without your penis. If not, you must stop torturing it. Once it's gone it will not grow back.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2007 4:48 am
by numnuts (imported)
I certainly hope I get to the point of takeing the step to get rid of my nuts. My real fear is finding the right surgeon, more than the idea of it. It's certainly a direction and course that I think is of no return. I don't know how it could not happen eventually. No matter the outcome, it would be a huge relief in at least one way. I have a feeling I'll look back and realize it was, really no big deal, and wonder why it took so long for me to realize that. I'm sure I'll wish I had had it done much sooner. But again, going through the obviously difficult process of finding a qualified surgeon, is really the main problem.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 7:41 am
by Kangan (imported)
numnuts (imported) wrote: Sat Jan 20, 2007 4:48 am
I certainly hope I get to the point of takeing the step to get rid of my nuts. My real fear is finding the right surgeon, more than the idea of it. It's certainly a direction and course that I think is of no return. I don't know how it could not happen eventually. No matter the outcome, it would be a huge relief in at least one way. I have a feeling I'll look back and realize it was, really no big deal, and wonder why it took so long for me to realize that. I'm sure I'll wish I had had it done much sooner. But again, going through the obviously difficult process of finding a qualified surgeon, is really the main problem.
The above words exactly echo my sentiments.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:30 pm
by willing2share5 (imported)
To be honest, I have no fear of being castrated. I used to torture my testicles, either with strong rubber bands or piercing. The piercing, in hindsight, was not among the smartest things I have ever done, even with the precautions I took. The pain was intense, but bearable to me. My apprehension is related to the hormone issues, which are significant, and not the physical act of being castrated.
My interest is in female domination and being cuckolded by my lady. As her cuckold, I would have few reasons to object to being castrated, if that is what we decided was best for us. After all, her lovers would have already replaced me in the sex bed and neither of us would have any further need of my genitals, at least for sex. Naturally I would continue to pleasure her orally and service her other needs after the procedure. Since I already have a castration interest, it would be quite easy for me to agree to my castration, preferably by a woman or at least with my lady participating in the procedure in some way.
I love the smooth look of a castrated male (with the scrotum removed). If not for the hormone issues, I would already be smooth. I'm sure the hormone apprehension can be overcome and the only hard part now is to find the woman that would be interested in such a lifestyle.
Will
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 10:30 pm
by Hash (imported)
Willingtoshare,
Just so you know, once you are actually castrated, your current thoughts about female domination and servicing her, will leave you, if you live without "Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). Your current sexual thoughts, which include being cuckolded, will not matter to you. You will not care about it, unless you use some form of testosterone. You see, without "testosterone," sex in any form will not matter. You will not care about it, ask any of us eunuchs. Even now, with my small dose testosterone usage, I don't care much about sex or doing the sexual things I did before. What you are now, how you think about sex and being a sexual slave, will not matter after you are castrated. You will not look forward to servicing your lady or meeting her sexual needs, it will take a great effort. You need to know this, understand it; don't get castrated if you want to remain 100% sexual.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 1:16 pm
by mrt (imported)
Hash (imported) wrote: Mon Jan 22, 2007 10:30 pm
Willingtoshare,
Just so you know, once you are actually castrated, your current thoughts about female domination and servicing her, will leave you, if you live without "Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). Your current sexual thoughts, which include being cuckolded, will not matter to you. You will not care about it, unless you use some form of testosterone. You see, without "testosterone," sex in any form will not matter. You will not care about it, ask any of us eunuchs. Even now, with my small dose testosterone usage, I don't care much about sex or doing the sexual things I did before. What you are now, how you think about sex and being a sexual slave, will not matter after you are castrated. You will not look forward to servicing your lady or meeting her sexual needs, it will take a great effort. You need to know this, understand it; don't get castrated if you want to remain 100% sexual.
Well said! And while I have no experience with sexual slavery what would the appeal be to a women? What I mean to say is what about a sexless male is sexualy appealing? I think the woman he seeks would be rare indeed. I only had "low" testosterone levels and my wife would ask (beg, get angry) about sex and my reaction was "Huh? Didn't we JUST do that?" the answer of course being *Yes 1 or 2 months ago. Be VERY careful what you wish for. You might get it.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 5:42 pm
by penispain69 (imported)
Hash (imported) wrote: Fri Jan 19, 2007 9:41 pm
Dear Penispain,
Like you, I tortured my testicles for several years, then one day I went past the point of no return, which is where you are headed. One day you will wake up and start to torture your penis and you will either injure it beyond the point of your normal routine, or you will destroy it or cut it off. Maybe next week, next month, next year, but you are on a slippery slope of eventually acting upon your fantasy. How do I know? I've been where you are and where a lot of others have been.
Fantasy can last a long time, but it seems that eventually we act out our fantasy. If you keep torturing your penis, one day you will go to far. Think very carefully about this and ask yourself if you could live without your penis. If not, you must stop torturing it. Once it's gone it will not grow back.
I know what you mean and I understand all the facts. My ex was a nurse and I also know a lot about sex and the sex drive. My ex was a sex-a-holic, my current wife isn't. She also has a very hard time achieving orgasm so 99% of the time it is with oral or by hand.
I appreciate you taking the time to inform people of all the ramifications.
Thanks again.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Sun Jan 28, 2007 9:27 am
by ballsontheline (imported)
I have been trying to get by my fear. I am married and my wife has sex with other hung guys. I am her cucold and one of her regulars is a 21 year old body builder with a 9 inch dick. He makes me beg to be castrated before he will let me cum. He has also told me that he should have my penis cut off so I will be wild with desire but with no way to get release.
He had me email and write to Dr. Kimmel. I am afraid to loose my penis or my balls but it turns me on so much. I fear that I will regret my loss. My wifes 21 year old stud wants me to get past my fear and loose either my cock or my balls.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Fri Feb 02, 2007 10:58 am
by king of harts (imported)
I have some fears as well, both me and my wife have been discussing this at some length for about 2 yrs. What I want is to have SRS or sex reassignment surgery but still live as a man as I have no interest to dress orlive as a woman. Having a vagina would be all that I would want to possess. My wife while not being supportive at first has somewhat come around if it would made me happy. I am now in search of a surg. that would perform on me
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Mon Feb 05, 2007 9:53 pm
by Hash (imported)
King of Harts,
You might want to try castration first and then see if that satisfies you. Some transsexuals have stated that after they were castrated, they did not need to go further with additional surgery. Castration satisfied their desire(s).
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Tue Feb 06, 2007 11:23 am
by Hairless (imported)
king of harts (imported) wrote: Fri Feb 02, 2007 10:58 am
I have some fears as well, both me and my wife have been discussing this at some length for about 2 yrs. What I want is to have SRS or sex reassignment surgery but still live as a man as I have no interest to dress orlive as a woman. Having a vagina would be all that I would want to possess. My wife while not being supportive at first has somewhat come around if it would made me happy. I am now in search of a surg. that would perform on me
I have a lot of the same issues that you have. Hash makes a good point. Sometimes castration is enough to satisfy you. At least it's a good place to start, all though you would be well advised to try the chemical route first. What you ultimately desire is almost impossible without living as a woman for 2 years first. You would be hard pressed to find a surgeon that would not require the trial period, even surgeons in Thailand require it. I was castrated and had my scrotum removed and I am much happier. I'm not saying I'm 100% cured, but I think I can live the rest of my life this way and be content.
You can read what I went through if you want at:Is Kimmel the best way to go? in the surgical castration area.
Hope this helps, Steve
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Tue Feb 06, 2007 12:03 pm
by Riverwind (imported)
I don't think I had a fear of castration per say, but am I doing the right thing?
I used a chemical castration drug for a year and during that time I knew this was right for me. That was 4 1/2 years ago and I have never regretted my decision. My ex and kids know and everybody is cool with it. For me it was the right thing to do. For those of you thinking about it I can only say, take your time.
River
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Tue Feb 06, 2007 12:32 pm
by mrt (imported)
ballsontheline (imported) wrote: Sun Jan 28, 2007 9:27 am
I have been trying to get by my fear. I am married and my wife has sex with other hung guys. I am her cucold and one of her regulars is a 21 year old body builder with a 9 inch dick. He makes me beg to be castrated before he will let me cum. He has also told me that he should have my penis cut off so I will be wild with desire but with no way to get release.
He had me email and write to Dr. Kimmel. I am afraid to loose my penis or my balls but it turns me on so much. I fear that I will regret my loss. My wifes 21 year old stud wants me to get past my fear and loose either my cock or my balls.
If your for real understand that once your "fixed" your interest in sex is going to go to zero. So all this kinky stuff that rings your bell now will turn to a giant "Huh? Oh THAT again..."
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 2:29 am
by tugon (imported)
mrt (imported) wrote: Tue Feb 06, 2007 12:32 pm
If your for real understand that once your "fixed" your interest in sex is going to go to zero. So all this kinky stuff that rings your bell now will turn to a giant "Huh? Oh THAT again..."
My interest in sex has never completely gone away. I think it depends on the indidvidual. Even though I am not on replacement hormones I still have erotic dreams and find myself attracted to some men. I still have the need to masturbate when I am not with someone.
Re: Getting past your last fear!
Posted: Wed Feb 07, 2007 12:30 pm
by Hairless (imported)
ballsontheline (imported) wrote: Sun Jan 28, 2007 9:27 am
I have been trying to get by my fear. I am married and my wife has sex with other hung guys. I am her cucold and one of her regulars is a 21 year old body builder with a 9 inch dick. He makes me beg to be castrated before he will let me cum. He has also told me that he should have my penis cut off so I will be wild with desire but with no way to get release.
He had me email and write to Dr. Kimmel. I am afraid to loose my penis or my balls but it turns me on so much. I fear that I will regret my loss. My wifes 21 year old stud wants me to get past my fear and loose either my cock or my balls.
Your fears are usually there for a reason. Your profile says that this is what you want, but is it your thoughts or someone else's? You need to think long and hard before being nullified for the reasons you state. Once it's done, it's done for good. It might be easier to dump your wife and find a woman that likes a 4" cock. If you really want your equipment harvested, it seems I read some where here or on BME of a group that is looking for guys willing to donate their unwanted parts. They also have people that can do that for you. There are ways to orgasm even without your equipment I'm told. There is also a way to have a pleasure button, like a clit made for that purpose if the surgeon knows what he is doing. I believe the eunuch Thomas talks about this on his web sight. His surgeon offered that option to him, but he declined. If you want to get sexually frustrated just take testosterone after your nullified.