Hormones, life decisions, gender and, probably, other things.

[fhunter]

Where do I start? Probably the same place I was when I stopped androcur two years (or so) ago.

Ok, not exactly the same place...A bit more money, better job (this is questionable, but at least this place pays well, and I have yet to hear gay-themed jokes) and living on my own.

Why have I started the thread? I am still thinking about going back on antiandrogens. The gender/aesthetics,etc.. questions haven't disappeared anywhere, they were just pushed really deep for that time. What happened is, that I ended up in hospital for a week (that was a month ago), and unsurprisingly, got probably too much time to think. That triggered thinking about what I want for myself, instead of running from myself and problems.

So here I am in early stages if planning this. In any case I am not going to do anything until after the trip to Thailand and Cambodia. (I do not like an idea of taking antiandrogens through customs on transit (thinking of potential language barrier and so on)).

PS. There will be the followup post, cause this one is written from the tablet computer, and it's keyboard is horrible.

[butterflyjack (imported)]

fhunter..Why the trip to Cambodia and Thailand?? While there, you might want to check out their surgical services and avoid the need for anti-androgens...forever..A couple hundred bucks..et voila...eunuch...Wonderful, eh? smooches Jackie

[daifu-orchid (imported)]

Thailand -what an opportunity! They do it for less than was the copay on my insurance. You could even choose what to be done -anything between an easy orchie and a smoothie nullo. All done with professional staff and best surroundings.

I gotta agree with Jackie. Wonderful is the understatement!

[Uncle Flo (imported)]

Although you are not ready for surgery I agree that you may have an opportunity to research the possibility. In any case, enjoy the trip. --FLO--

[fhunter]

fhunter..Why the trip to Cambodia and Thailand?? While there, you might want to check out their surgical services and avoid the need for anti-androgens...forever..A couple hundred bucks..et

voila...eunuch...Wonderful, eh? smooches Jackie

Thailand -what an opportunity! They do it for less than was the copay on my insurance. You could even choose what to be done -anything between an easy orchie and a smoothie nullo. All done with professional staff and best surroundings.

I gotta agree with Jackie. Wonderful is the understatement!

Ok, I was a bit late with the followup, but life got in a way (gathering final vaccinations for Cambodia, work and so on).

To answer the questions - I wouldn't be alone there, so orchie is out of the question even if I was ready for it.

It started when I thought about how and where to spend my vacation time and sister asked, if I wanted to accompany her and nephew to Thailand and Cambodia. It was an opportunity, which one does not refuse (I want to see the world , and I was kept from that for some time, due to dodging the draft, and letting my international passport to expire in process).

So that is the primary reason of going. If in process, I get a "feel" of country, it would be a plus. Not sure, if I'll be able to research anything surgery related there, probably no.

[mccrayle (imported)]

Thailand -what an opportunity! They do it for less than was the copay on my insurance. You could even choose what to be done -anything between an easy orchie and a smoothie nullo. All done with professional staff and best surroundings.

I gotta ag

ree with Jackie. Wonderful is the understatement!

Is that still possible, then, in Thailand? When I make inquiries, they all tell me 'visits to two Thai psychiatrists are required + female gender identity; and if you don't appear en femme - they won't believe you.'

If anyone knows an address with a different policy, I'd be all ear.

[daifu-orchid (imported)]

Nick Connor

[email protected] and if you need more info, you can Google the name with Thailand.

(Hope this post is not out of line. Pse squish promptly if so.)

The name comes up frequently on many forums etc. This is not a recommendation one way or the other.

He speaks English and his wife works as a nurse in Thailand.

[mccrayle (imported)]

Nick Connor

[email protected] and if you need more info, you can Google the name with Thailand.

(Hope this post is not out of line. Pse squish promptly if so.)

The name comes up frequently on many forums etc. This is not a recommendation one way or the other.

He speaks English and his wife works as a nurse in Thailand.

FYI, he was one of those who told me 'only for transgenders, and if you don't appear en femme - no deal'.

[fhunter]

FYI, he was one of those who told me 'only for transgenders, and if you don't appear en femme - no deal'.

The question is - does one need to be passable, or is the 'en femme' requirement only to satisfy some local law/medical community requirement?

[bimale4fun23 (imported)]

The question is - does one need to be passable, or is the 'en femme' requirement only to satisfy some local law/medical community requirement?

En femme only to satisfy local/medical community and that you are in right mind and know what you are doing

[thraddash (imported)]

Nick Connor helped me get through the process at the time. Dressing up and playing the part of a woman trapped in a mans body is a requirement for the psychological side of things, regardless of what you went there for. After you get the letters showing you're not crazy you can negotiate with the surgeon about almost anything.

I'm not sure how things work these days since he has found a more permanent job on a neighbouring island. But I certainly wouldn't want to go through all that without him AND his wife (she is basically consulted with after your interview is over and you leave the office).

[mccrayle (imported)]

Nick Connor helped me get through the process at the time. Dressing up and playing the part of a woman trapped in a mans body is a requirement for the psychological side of things, regardless of what you went there for.

Ok, thanks for the info.

So does anyone know an address where lying to psychiatrists is not required?

(Or can someone confirm that there's no such place on the entire planet?)

[nullorchis (imported)]

Testosterone's positives and negatives are touched upon in the article in this link from Harvard.

http://www.health.harvard.edu/fhg/updat ... eart.shtml

My main point:

Don't assume super low T is good.

Assume super high T is bad.

Like cholesterol it needs to be just right.

With balls, nature is in control of you.

Without balls, or with balls that produce no T, you have an opportunity to be in control.

Use that opportunity wisely.

I lived with high T most of my life.

Once I eliminated T production, I experienced low T.

I did not like either. Life was miserable.

Now, under Dr. supervision, I am at a "just right" level, about 400.

Life is good.

[nonuts (imported)]

Ok, thanks for the info.

So does anyone know an address where lying to psychiatrists is not required?

(Or can someone confirm that there's no such place on the entire planet?)

"Lying" is a bit strong, and quite a rude accusation it's an uncalled for disparaging remark.

[graylayer02 (imported)]

"Lying" is a bit strong, and quite a rude accusation it's an uncalled for disparaging remark.

This is actually a problem with the whole gatekeeping mentality encouraged by the psychiatric and legal systems. It definitely encourages fanciful stories tailored to fit a checklist, rather than being able to talk honestly about the needs of the patient. And it needlessly ties genitals with gender presentation, while these things have nothing to do with each other in reality. If I were queen of the world, I'd totally redo the way that trans care was done.

That said, twenty minutes in an ill-fitting dress and a horrible wig with Nick's wife making comments about your moobs is a small price to pay, and it's best to have a fixer like Nick who can navigate the paperwork. It's not like the surgery and recovery are inherently a dignified process anyhow, although the people at the hospital are good people, and they do their best. Trust me, doing things this way is far better than most alternatives I can think of.

[mccrayle (imported)]

Being new on this forum, let me apologize immediately if I sounded condescending. It wasn't meant that way at all.

I just wanted to ask if anyone knew alternatives better suited to non-transgenders, that's all.

[graylayer02 (imported)]

Being new on this forum, let me apologize immediately if I sounded condescending. It wasn't meant that way at all.

I just wanted to ask if anyone knew alternatives better suited to non-transgenders, that's all.

Well, I'd be willing to bet that someone interested in bottom surgery might be trans* where * is a wildcard--not to force an identity on anyone or to erase alternative identities. There are non-binary transgender and/or transsexual folk which overlap with those who identify as eunuchs or something else; there are binary trans* people, plus the old pejorative word 'transvestite' which basically just means cisgender crossdresser. And be aware that one's immediate or mid-range desires and/or identity may change over time. That's OK and it's a part of life.

I'm a case in point. I started off as non-binary transsexual (eunuch more or less), moved toward non-binary transgender in my presentation, and have since migrated into a more binary transgender direction. The 'official' textbook narrative is more or less in the opposite direction from that, and yet that order of transition has been definitely right for me. By getting certain types of physical dysphoria out of the way, I was able to buy some time and to more cautiously explore the social side of transition. Also in my case it was very much necessary to androgynize my appearance before I started pushing forward on a full-blown social transition.

The problem is, the medical establishment is not set up for messy real-life narratives like this. There is no logical connection between the disposition of my former penis (or even beginning hormones) and whether or not I look good with eyeliner or a skirt. Yet the 'official' narrative makes bottom surgery or even hormones the reward for being female (or male) enough. This is done entirely to protect doctors, since this puts people, particularly those forced go go DIY (ahem ahem), at life-threatening risk.

The best option really might be to suck it up, wear a skirt for 20 minutes, and appreciate it for the sick joke that it is. That is, unless you like wearing skirts. If you've never done so, it might be fun, especially in the Thai heat.

[fhunter]

Ok, I am back from Thailand and Cambodia, that was fun...

Mostly. Night flight back from Thailand wasn't fun. If the flight to Thailand was mostly empty, and we could just use 3 seats as a bed , the flight back was packed, and I am a bit too long, to properly sleep in an airplane seat. Jumping first 5 time zones back and then 2 time zones forward in 2 days wasn't fun either, especially with the lack of sleep.

No, I did not cosplay Lara Croft, but I visited the temple, where it was filmed.

[fhunter]

So, the current plan is:

1. Get tested on at least T/E levels.

2. Think about hormone regime

3. Acquire hormones and proceed.

4. Who knows...

[fhunter]

I'll be offline (at least not actively online) for some time, due to the untimely death of my home server which provided me with the internet and stored my files.

That'll probably teach me not to ignore "health" warnings, and act immediately, and not when it ended up in catatonic state.