Brother in Great Need Luvpain99

[bobbie (imported)]

One of our closet brothers is going through a very difficult and trying time in his life. He had a break up with is boyfriend/lover. This has brought he to the edge of life and death. I am talking about our very close and trusted friend Luvpain99. I am sure that any one that has read the message board has come across his writings. He is very active operator in the chat room night. He is a friend to all.

Luvpain has had massage headaches for over a half a year. They are getting worse every day and has driven him to the point of despair. I am asking all of you to say a prayer for his recovery and to give him the strength to continue to want to live. I beg all of you to help our Dear brother. He may be only looking at his IAM message board. Hope he will look here as well.

[OneBallBoi (imported)]

Anyone who is into praying being today is Sunday, please remember luvpain99.

Luvpain is my best friend. In the last year, he has made some terrific positive changes to me. Right now he needs help. He needs to know that every one of his friends support him. There are changes that need to happen in his life. I just hope he can think clearly enough to see the right direction to go into. Luvpain, if you read this. I am there for you and willing to help in any way I can.

[Riverwind (imported)]

Luv, my heart goes out to you my friend, I know how the headachs are having gone through that myself. Just hang in there untill the doctors figure what is causing them and gives you the cure. It may take awhile but hang on my friend. We all are on your side in this. If you need to call or get away give me a ring and we will figure something out.

[surf_toad (imported)]

Dude, there is nothing worse than Migraine headaches. Nothing i can think of at all. I wish you did not have them. As i have been battling depression for years i can understand your plight. I am not going to tell you to hang in there, things will get better, but any and every time i see you in the room, you always got a spot on my shoulder, you have always been good to me. (i hope and pray things get better for you though)

Hang on. your life is just around the corner

Toad

[SplitDik (imported)]

I always have to hit rock bottom before I pick myself back up. The thing to remember is that there always is an "up", just be patient and it will come.

[jemagirl (imported)]

Dear Luv,

I hope you feel better soon. I can't say I know what you are going through as I have never had migraines before. I just hope these headaches go away soon and that you feel better.

Jema

[sag111 (imported)]

Luvpain i sure hope things get better for you i am so sorry that you are going through all thies things after you have gotten what you wanted .I will keep you in my prayers and thoughts you have tought me so much and i just want to let you know i care about you my friend.

[An Onymus (imported)]

There are many different methods for treating headache pain, and for reducing the likelihood that headaches will develop. Some are provided by the traditional medical establishment, but quite a number come from alternative medicine. I would assume that different remedies work for different people, so it might be worthwhile to keep trying various methods until you find one that works.

[Quillman (imported)]

So sorry to hear of your problem, hope and pray it does get better for you. A thought, have you eliminated eye strain - especially prevalent with staring at computer screens for long periods. Yes I know we all do that, but if your eyesight is out of focus even slightly- or if you have glasses and they are not the right ones' it could well be the problem. Look well if it is only the eyesight test is required. Hope this helps.

Best regards

Quillman UK

[luvpain (imported)]

Well the headaches have been causing eye problems, left eye seems to be going in and out of focus. I just had vision test done in Sept and new glasses. I also have purchased LCD panels a year ago to lower the strain on my eyes.

Right now the tests that have occured are CAT Scan of Brain which was negative. An MRA of Brain that showed no problems. An EEG showing that my brain waves were abnormal indicating I most likely had a small stoke at some time. I just got to wait for more tests and see if they can find some medication that actually works.

I have been told to look into acupuncture, I just haven't been very motivated or had the energy to check into things lately.

[Dave (imported)]

MSG, cheap dried rosemary, and tarragon give me splitting headaches similar ro migraines. So does Caffiene withdrawal (sometimes, not always)

Is it possible that your headaches are an allergic reaction?

[luvpain (imported)]

If it is an allergic reaction, then it has to be something that is contained in any and all foods as I get them no matter what I eat, or even if I go with out eating for a while. Although I have found that certain things on the "Do not eat list" that the neurologist gave me seems to actually help lower the intensatiy of the headaches. Caffiene was on the list and I hadn't been drinking that for over a year when my regular Dr prescribed Floricet (Tylenol, Caffiene, and a barbituate) so I decided to start drinking more caffiene which has helped some.

Trust me, I am trying to come up with a pattern as to what causes the headaches and avoid anything that causes them. But there is no rhyme or reason to them from what I can see. I had a major one occur last night just out of the blue whiched forced me to goto bed early.

[Dave (imported)]

Well don't give up the search. This type of allergy is very subtle. Look for perfumes, colognes, or chemicals. I used to work in the laboratory and now I can get a headache when I fill up my car (from the fumes of gasoline) ... perfume departments in stores are particularly harrowing and I avoid them. It might be something else, I could be wrong, but it took years for me to discover what was causing my problems. I still get headaches about once a month and come home to lay down.

[luvpain (imported)]

I get them at home, at work, out eating, up north and pretty much every single day of the week. They usually last all day long but vary in intensaty thruout the day.

[surf_toad (imported)]

i still feel for you man. i wish there was something i could do. you just hang in there. that light at the end of the tunnel is not always an oncoming train.

[luvpain (imported)]

Well today was probably the best day I have had in a month. The pain was still there but I was able to tolerate it and work without people telling me how bad I looked.

I also got a new tattoo today My 12th one which always makes me feel better.

[OneBallBoi (imported)]

I feel a great need to re-ignite this thread. There has been no secret that luvpain99 and I hold a special bond between each other. I spoke to luvpain on the phone last night for over an hour. He has several important Doctors appointments next week and one serious test. He is really hurting badly right. He need to see posts of encouragement to hang in there right now from everyone that reads the message board. If any of you read nis IAM page, I believe you can see the pain he is in from his posts. Thanks to each one that posts. I know it will help him.

[Andrew (imported)]

Well today was probably the best day I have had in a month. The pain was still there but I was able to tolerate it and work without people telling me how bad I looked.

I also got a new tattoo today My 12th one which always makes me feel better.

12? Where and what? (For the record, I have NO tattoos and NO plans to ever have one. I've had enough work on my body for one lifetime.

[Scottie (imported)]

One of our closet brothers is going through a very difficult and trying time in his life. He had a break up with is boyfriend/lover. This has brought he to the edge of life and death. I am talking about our very close and trusted friend Luvpain99. I am sure that any one that has read the message board has come across his writings. He is very active operator in the chat room night. He is a friend to all.

Luvpain has had massage headaches for over a half a year. They are getting worse every day and has driven him to the point of despair. I am asking all of you to say a prayer for his recovery and to give him the strength to continue to want to live. I beg all of you to help our Dear brother. He may be only looking at his IAM message board. Hope he will look here as well.

I just want to say this about that. I lost my 1st wife to a nasty divorce. I went into absolute shock. My arms where on fire, burning and so where my legs and thighs. I had what they call post tramatic stress disorder. It nearly killed me to feel the physical pain as well as the emotional pain. I was nautous and couldn't eat. I wanted to die, or to sleep all the time. It was awful and I know seperation of anykind is awful. There isint much to do about it. I would suggest going to see a shrink and maybe even getting some medication to help you get through it all. there is a great book called CrazyTimes Divorce. It helped me to save mylife. Prayer works too. the best thing is to get out with your friends and keep active. If you are alone to much it seems that the pain gets worse. It will pass and you will have good days and bad days. Im free of it now after 5 years and Im re-married. Not being alone is the best. My prayers are with you too! Scottie

[bobbie (imported)]

I think that I may have found a possible cause to many of the problems luvpaing is having. It may not correct the headache but may solve some to the other problems he is having. One of the drugs he has been taking for a very long time has many know side effects which he has told us he has. I have taken the same drug and have had blured vision, felt more sleepy even when I got enough sleep. I have told him about the drug and sent him a web site with information on the side effects. I am hoping that he will read my message again and please stop taking the drug for a while and see if things change for the better. I have no idea how long the after effects of the drug will last. I know the effects on my vision last a few days. I was not on the drug for any length of time as luvpain has. The big problem is this is an over the counter drug.

[Paolo]

I just saw the thread, Luv, sorry. I have not been on or around much.

I tend to agree with Bobbie about the side effects of drugs.

When I was a kid, I had headaches. First it was eye tests, new glasses, limited TV watching, all of which failed.

I don't remember what I was taking or for what, but it turned out to be the medication.

I sincerely hope that this is what it is and that you get over this.

Headaches are certainly no fun.

I'll be thinking of you; please keep us informed.

P

[A-1 (imported)]

LUV,

Headaches, migrane headaches, generally have a psychological component. This does not mean that they are not real. They ARE real, VERY real. But it does give one pause to analyze and to retain the belief that there is nothing physically wrong after the proper tests are performed to rule out such terrible things as aneurysms, brain tumors and other horrendous physical abnormalities.

Love is a phenomenon that makes all of us physically ill at one point or another. It is my learned opinion that it makes us mentally ill, also. The things that we do when we are in love that jepardize ourself, our bodies, our minds and our lives are illogical at best and insane at the worst.

Love is no respector of gender, race, age or even species in some cases. But the more emotional we get while we are in this mental state the more damage that we can do to our minds, our bodies, our souls and the lives of those who are around us.

At some point your view of your significant other must "NORMALIZE" if your life is to get better. You must realize that there are others who are more deserving of your love that the object that you have focused it upon. Perhaps I might suggest that the most deserving of your love is yourself. Your life and YOUR body and your mind are the most precious things that you have. You only get one of each. Anything that causes you to feel and to act as you are when you are hurting is not worthy of your affection.

When I was young I fell in love once. It lasted about 28 years. It is terrible. I have come to realize that my view of the object of my love was not realistic. I used to think that hormones caused me to "fall in love". That is not true. What causes us to fall in love is a mental process that allows us to place the object of our love ahead of our own existance. We simply cannot do that and remain alive. Luckily, the object of my affection did not claim me as a casuality. She was not destructive to both of us. Yes, we are still together, but sometimes I do not know how or why and I am sure that she does not know, either. But, believe me, others look much, much better than her now, and I am certain that they look better than me. I am in a position in life where others are available to me and vulnerable, some are no doubt even drowning, but having been through what I have been through, I will not jump in. I know better. I help when I can, but I maintain my safe distance.

In fact, we cannot do it, jump in, and truly "LOVE". We must first love ourselves. Then, once we have that resolved all else falls in place. We cannot allow others to put us into a mental or physical state that is destructive. Playful is one thing but DESTRUCTIVE will destroy us but worse it will contribute to the tearing down of those around us and in turn be destructive to humanity in general. While in the state I describe we do not care if we live or die, true. But those who look upon us, those with whom we share our existance care. Look at all of us who have responded to you on this post. We are your supporters. Some have been through the process that I describe. Some are still in it.

You must realize that you cannot truly love anybody but yourself, however, you can support the love of another for theirself. This is what each of us are doing for you now. It is in this way that humanity can show affection to each other without hurt or destruction.

Being in love is a bit like swimming in water that is above your head. If you lose the instinct for self perservation, you drown. If there is a drowning person close to you and you attempt to save them, they will climb upon you and cause you to drown. After they do that they will be in the same predicament in which you found them. They will be pathetic and looking for somebody else to "save" them, but you will be dead.

If you must love, do it from a position of strength, just as you must be on firm ground when you attempt to save somebody from drowning. BE aware that if you jump in with them that you had better be a damnned good swimmer (or lover of yourself) or you will surely drown. At that point it matters little that you are dead because they will still be downing.

Remember that a near death experience in such a situation as this can teach you how to swim. It can also teach you how to LOVE. It is a teachable moment and it is up to us to make it a learnable moment and to profit from it.

I have learned that love is not about sex. Sex is a part of it, but not it at all.

If you love and die in the process the object of your affection will no longer have somebody to love them, so you will have done them no good at all. Similarly, if you attempt to save a drowning person and you drown yourself, they will still be drowning. Your affection for them has no significance in their existance.

LUV, never forget. YOUR life will normalize. You WILL love again if it is only that you LOVE yourself.

And... that is not so bad, after all, you are a neat guy.

If you need us, we are here...

A-1