Well I have decided to return back to the EA. It has been a long break and I'm still working on getting myself back together.
I know many of you have worried about me since my hospital stay last June but I think I have finally found the right shrink and counselor for me and the right set of medication. My depression and mood seems to be undercontrol and sleeping has been doing better except for tonight for some reason.
I've still been plagued by headaches constantly, pretty much 50% of the days I will deal with them. Between them, the mini-stroke, and medication I am unable to concentrate and focus and then to get worn out easily and want to sleep or rest all the time. That means I am unfit to work full time so I'm working on getting disability which I hope I get to pay bills, and also means I need to take breaks from the computers frequently sometimes so I may be arround for short periods checking in multiple times some days and other days may just check in once if at all.
welcome back my friend. You have surely been missed by bunches and gobs of us! We love you and are truely sorry the head is still an issue. be well. take your time and feel free to PM me any time you need a spare shoulder. I love you man!
It's great to have you back. I hope that you are shopping around for a doctor who actually listens to you and takes you seriously. Remember that YOU are hiring the doctor. He is YOUR employee and you can fire him and search for someone better if he doesn't work out.
While the headaches are probably the most worrisome (and painful) in the short run, your first concern probably ought to be your depression. Depression is basically a brain chemistry malady.
It's been well known for many years that estrogen helps the brain to fight off depression. That's why the rate of depression jumps dramatically when women go through menopause. What's less well known is that testosterone also helps with brain chemistry and helps to ward off depression. Your doctor needs to be aware of the problem and willing to work with you to get you through it.
There is good evidence that, for young people like yourself, the brain CAN heal if you are faithful in using an SSRI to keep the brain chemistry in check. Once you and your doctor find the right medication, if you are absolutely faithful and don't miss a dose for a year and a half or more, you can talk to him about trying to gradually move off the medication.
Headaches are nasty. Depression can kill. We all want you around for a long time. Take good care of yourself and check in with your friends here regularly. We'll do whatever we can to help.
You're one of the "good people" of the world and we really do care about you.
Well now that I'm on my 5th shrink and 4th anti-depressant and anti-psycotic medication I have finally found ones that seem to work and have few side effects although I don't have to worry about work at the moment so I think that helps.
I know the stuff is defintely working, along with stuff to reduce anxiety and stress I feel a lot better. I do seem to be able to handle things easier now. Although trust me the Headache are a big problem as they get me very down and depressed. I have managed to find medication to help ease them and treat the pain for short periods of times. I'll have a few days where I won't have any and then a few days to a week where I'll suffer with them all day long. At least they have gone down in intensity or I'm getting more tollerant of them.
So far they have not found any cause for the headaches, however they have noted that I have had a small stoke sometime in the past. Talking with my neurologist he indicated that stokes can cause problems with concentration, focus, memory and other tasks. Those are ones I have been dealing with alot lately.
I know I'm on low dosage of the medications since my body seems to be very sensative to them. I'm just very curious as to how much of the depression is related to damagecaused by the stroke, since I seem to be fine normally it just that I seem to have very bad luck and tons of bad stuff hits me all at onces and is hard to take and deal with. I can see the pattern with my depression.
Oh. BTW I am taking my medication regularly. I very seldom miss a dose.
Welcome home. We all have missed you. I am so happy that you are on some drugs that finally are working. I know how that feels myself. I am glad to see you posting again and also loved it the other night when you were in the chat.
Here here ... add my sentiments to the chorus of well wishers. It's good to have you here and to hear reports that, even amid some ongoing problems, things are better than they have been in the recent past.
As I am sure you know, these "mini-strokes" are transient attacks (you get a small clot on the brain which then disolves - be warned, I am very dyslexic so some of my letter may seem like a stroke. Joke, by the way). What this means is that you have a termporary block in your brain which stops bits of your brain communicating with the rest of your brain. This can be very distressing (both for the afflicted and for the obsevers), but it really isn't worth worrying about. Shit happens, and life could be worse.
These attacks almost always cause severe headaches (often exceptionally pianful), often at the front of the head (and often confused with migraine - which is a half-head ache, the mini-stroke being just as painful, but usually over the entirety of a brain hemisphere - not on one side as in migraine - thogh light-sensitivity and similar symptoms shared with migraine may be apparent during a mini-stroke). Some loss of verbal power can be apparent, but that passes, usually after between half an hour and three hours. Full motor and other functions usually return within a very short space of time. Bed-rest is the best cure. (I know what I am talking about. I have witnessed these things in person - most recently, last week.).
How to avoid?
I hope you are taking your 75 milligrams of aspirin every morning after breakfast (don't ever take aspirin on an empty stomach). Also, you must respect aspirin. This is not a drug that should ever again be used as a painkiller. It is a blood-thinner. If you have a head-ache, take paracetamol (and, for God's sake, take it as directed on the packet - you really do not want to die of paracetamol-induced organ-failure - that is a hell of a death, literally, believe me.)
You write about being depressed, and about depression in general. I have found that no anti-depressants work for me. They usually make me worse, and I am psychotic (not dangerously, I hasten to add). My on-going research for a medication that stops me from feeling sad all the time (that is how my depression affects me) has resulted in a natural preparation called "Rhodiola Rosea". This is a superlative natural remedy which may well help you. It has certainly helped me.
Because I do not know in which country you reside, I can only tell you how to get it in England. Go to "Viridian" and buy it from them - don't use Solgar, their version is crap.
Russian athletes have used this preparation for years (when not taking whatever the hell else they take). You can also look this up on the intenet.
The Germans are especially good at natural anti-depressant therapy. You might find St John's Wort helps. But, if you really think you have psychotic tendencies, then try the Rhodiola. It has changed my life. It may well change yours. But, you must take three capsules per day. It simply won't work if you don't - I'm going on the Viridian capsules). If you want more info, I can provide it.
Whatever you decide, remember this: You are not alone. Also, remember this too: "We owe it to ourselves to be happy". Stop being unhappy and distressed. Seek, and you really will find. Most people in this world are pretty nice, and most of them will bend over backwards to help. Never be afraid of being helped.
Karelescu (imported) wrote: Tue Aug 31, 2004 1:13 pm
Oh, and shrinks. It took me four years to find the right peson. Now, I am so much better. Never lose hope. Help is out there.
Best,
Nicky
are you a doctor karelescu, if so you can give us a lot of good advice witch you did. great!!
i found a article posted here , and i think you should reed it. i think it is very much in use for you. not only for you but to all of the males who are castrated or interested in castration. and have some sort of depression or dont know anymore what is going on.
For most, the depression is caused by chemical changes in your brain as a direct result of the castration. It has nothing to do with 'regret' or 'not thinking things through'.
Not being an endochrinologist, I am unsure as to the exact mechanism, but according to some of the reading I have done, there is a link between testosterone and serotonin (the chemical thought to be responsible for mood regulation).
Now, regret may not be the cause of depression, but I'd be willing to bet depression can be the cause of regret.------------------------------------------------------------
this is one of the best lines about "depressions" ( i call it i dont know what is happening to me, and i had it too) i read so far.
I am taking a host of differnet medication, strokes, etc. I do know my Blood is very strange I tend to bleed fairly easily yet at the same time my blood is very thick. I'm taking 81mg of aspirin at night that is all the asprin I take. I do tend to use Tylenol products but not very often I have gone down to just using the prescription stuff and using that just seldomly to avoid addiction issues.
I used to think that there wasn't any medication out there that would help but between my neurologist and shrink I have found stuff that helps,although I still notice anytime stress appears I still have problems but not as bad. I just seem to be able to handle it a little better now I guess.
Good to see you back, welcome from this side of the pond!
A-1 