Hello little gay people living inside my computer

[Present-Square-3763]

Hello, I'm 19.
I almost had a radical penectomy with the Mexico Transgender Center (Dr. Aguilar) in March of 2025. However, my parents managed to illegally interfere and forced the doctor to cancel everything through threats. I was not given a refund.

My parents made me a promise. Which I now fully accept was a lie. They said they would pay me back the money I spent and, if I gave them time to "cure" me and it didn’t work, they would pay for the surgery out of their own pocket.

I was left with no options, as my surgery was already cancelled, and I had to return home to Spain.
So far, my parents have been sending me to psychiatrists and psychologists, but the psychiatrists seem to be on my side

I started HRT (estrogen patches and Androcur) on July 10th. Now that I’ve made up my mind about HRT, next time I have surgery, I’ll go for full nullification instead of settling for just a penectomy.

A few days ago, my psychiatrist told me that he might be able to arrange surgery here in Spain. I asked him a few questions, like the approximate cost, wait time, and whether insurance would cover it.
He said he’d send me an email in a few days with the answers.

To my knowledge (please correct me if I'm wrong), nullification surgeries haven’t been a possible option in Europe. So I'd like to document how this all goes.

[dandelion]

I'm sure there are many straight people who visit this forum also, if not a majority of them.

Thank you for sharing your story. I understand that you must be very angry with your parents for cancelling your surgery. That said, I would assume here that they did not act out of malicious intents. My guess is you have never shared with them your desire for penectomy. When they found out, that must have come as a shock to them. It's probably reasonable for them to want you to put this on hold, to think it through, consult professional help before actually having the surgery. After all, this process is irreversible.

Obviously I don't know about your family, but if I am to guess, I would assume they acted out of care.

Please forgive me if my assumptions are wrong. I am merely offering another angle as a complete stranger on the internet. Your body, your choice, but that doesn't mean others should not help you make sure this really is what you want.

[Present-Square-3763]

The name of the post is a joke lol, I didn't want to just name it "hi" or "hello"

I have a trans sister, she began taking hormones I think 2 or 3 years ago (I forgot), my parents found out about a year and a half ago.
Like 8 years ago she just came out as gay man, My parents still think that that it's all a phase and are unwilling to accept any of it.

My dad told me that what I'm doing is "evolutionary suicide" because I won't be able to have kids. And in his mind reproducing is the objective/meaning of life. (which explains why they have 5 kids lmao)
My parents also tried convicning me that this is all a cult and that the people I spoke to online are my surgeron's alt accounts
My mom told me not long ago that if my sister has bottom surgery she doesn't want to speak with her anymore.

I was gonna write a formal "contract" on paper for my parents to sign in which they would have a set time to "cure" me with specific conditions, my friend then told me that my dad was complaining to him that I'm offering him to sign a paper, which he doesn't want to do, likely because he is not actually willing to go along with his promise.

My parents have no interest in actually doing what's best for me. They want grandchildren and surgery would prevent me from being able to give them grandchildren.

[WheelyFixed]

Welcome to the forum, we aren't all gay here, but many of us are happy...

Unfortunately, by all reports, the various "cures" don't work, and can even be harmful... So I do hope that your psychiatrist is able to make the connections to help you get what you are after. I don't know about Spain, but I know that people have been able to get at least orchiectomies in the Netherlands, not sure about nullifications..

Have you considered offering to at least do sperm banking for your parents? It might be a bit more complicated and require you to come off the Androcur and HRT for a while, but it would mean that there would still be at least the potential for grand children. However I'm not sure that will help all that much as it seems like they may have more hangups that are deeper than that.

I hope you able to find a solution to get the care that you need.

WheelyFixed

[Present-Square-3763]

Hey, I did tell my mom that if grandchildren is her only concern then I could preserve a sperm sample, but she decided to start acting irrationally.
Additionally I no longer care what my parents think of this because I know they don't actually wanna help.

The psychiatrist I'm seeing funded a trans clinic a long time ago but ended up giving management of it to one of his colleagues, I already spoke with her a few times too. If it all works out and they give me a surgery date here and insurance covers it I won't be telling my parents because they would likely try interfering again. And I can't risk that happening again.

[WheelyFixed]

Makes sense, some times one has to decide between family and what you need. Not as bad as what you are going through but I had more than a few go-rounds with my parents which ended up with us not having a lot of contact beyond very occasional phone calls... (They are now both deceased, and I can't say I miss them much.)

WheelyFixed

[fhunter]

Hey, I did tell my mom that if grandchildren is her only concern then I could preserve a sperm sample, but she decided to start acting irrationally.
Additionally I no longer care what my parents think of this because I know they don't actually wanna help.

Well, how do you expect her to react?
But you almost copied one of my answers, when my parents were pushing for grandkids (oh joys, even without anyone 'on the horizon'). I replied almost exactly like you (I offered providing a sample and suggested they get a surrogate mother and deal with the child themselves, if they so want it). Results were... well, that stopped them asking that question for quite a while.

PS. There is also - 'but who will carry our family name!?!?!?' (if you haven't heard that before).

[Present-Square-3763]

Hello again people living inside my computer :3

I have news, today I was given an appointment in a month (8/9) (or 9/8 for the Americans ig)
hopefully they will clarify if insurance will cover the surgery and some of my other concerns. I'm really happy that I actually might be getting surgery soon

[WheelyFixed]

That is really great news, I'm glad they seem to be taking care of you. Here is hoping that all goes as you want it to and you are able to get the surgery you are wanting!

WheelyFixed