Attention,

[A-1 (imported)]

...how about a walking stick to match those dried up testicle ear rings...?

Just the thing for the well-dressed eunuch, a, well, see for yourself...

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... 84629&rd=1

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[Arab Nights (imported)]

And in Alaska there was something called an oolig (sp?), which is like a walrus penis bone. And we humans are stuck with descriptions similar to Napolean's genitals stored somewhere: small dried object. Jeez. How do the ladies make do with us?

[Uncle Flo (imported)]

sorry, I already have a cane (walking stick?) made of a bull penis. --FLO--

[kb57z (imported)]

And in Alaska there was something called an oolig (sp?), which is like a walrus penis bone. And we humans are stuck with descriptions similar to Napolean's genitals stored somewhere: small dried object. Jeez. How do the ladies make do with us?

I understand that better results can be achieved with a small device when employed by an expert than by a much larger one in the hands of someone with a poor technique. In any case, given that the charge and discharge times of a typical device provide only a very restricted duty cycle, the ladies apparently set more store by the secondary sexual characteristics. Such important aspects of human reproductive behaviour as a meal at a good restaurant will rapidly expose the typical walrus' lack of endowment in financial matters.....

[Arab Nights (imported)]

rapidly expose the typical walrus' lack of endowment in financial matters.....

Hmmm. Should I talk to Rosie about her hiring one for a personal financial planner?

[numnuts (imported)]

What about a coin purse made out of a scrotal sac? I hear they sell those in Australia to tourists, made from kangaroo scrotum.

[Slammr (imported)]

What about a coin purse made out of a scrotal sac? I hear they sell those in Australia to tourists, made from kangaroo scrotum.

It is said that the Whites who participated in the Sand Creek Massacre made tobacco purses out of the scrotums of the Native American men they killed.

Sand Creek Massacre (http://ny.essortment.com/sandcreekmassa_rfcp.htm)

Chivington firstly had his men seize the Indians horses to prevent escape. The Indians, expecting protection, watched in surprise. The people gathered under the American flag fluttering above Black Kettle's tipi, thinking this would afford them protection. Quickly, Black Kettle raised a white surrender flag on the same pole. But the soldiers ignored it and began shooting. They unloaded everything they had into the unfortunate villagers - rifle, pistol and cannon fire. The Indians ran in horror. But there was little place to hide. The soldiers herded the women and children into groups and murdered them in cold blood. They then performed outrageous depravities to their corpses. In one instance a six year old girl clutching a white flag was brought down in a hail of bullets - dead before she hit the ground. Babies brains were dashed out against trees. Bodies were scalped and ripped open with knives. Tobacco pouches were made out of men's private parts.

[JesusA]

Two quick notes:

First, the penis bone (the baculum or os penis) of a walrus is about the right size and shape to make a nice club. They have a good heft and would probably do considerable damage. I handled the only one I've laid hands on quite gently though. It had wonderful Inuit carving at both ends and a hand grip that was well polished.

Second, somewhere in my readings, I came across a reference to the warden of one of the territorial prisons in the Western U.S. (Arizona, I think) who used to remove the scrotum from all men who were hanged in the prison. He had them tanned and turned into tobacco pouches. It's probably been 40 years or more since I read it, but I may be able to track down the reference through an uncle who's never forgotten a word he's read about the Old West. I'm sure it was in a book that I borrowed from him.

[numnuts (imported)]

Second, somewhere in my readings, I came across a reference to the warden of one of the territorial prisons in the Western U.S. (Arizona, I think) who used to remove the scrotum from all men who were hanged in the prison. He had them tanned and turned into tobacco pouches. It's probably been 40 years or more since I read it, but I may be able to track down the reference through an uncle who's never forgotten a word he's read about the Old West. I'm sure it was in a book that I borrowed from him.

How fascinating, I would love to read that article. I wonder if that is something that would be possible (read allowable) if (read when) I have my own scrotum removed down the road. And who would do that work, a taxidermist or tanner? I could only imagine the phone conversations while searching for someone to do that for me.

[An Onymus (imported)]

I remember reading that, after a battle in the Middle Ages in Central Asia, the winning commander had the scrotums removed from the enemy dead, and the sacs were tanned and made into a tent. Don't know how big a tent. The name that comes to mind regarding this, is Tamerlane, but it doesn't seem like the kind of thing he would have done. Don't remember where I read the story.

[Uncle Flo (imported)]

This thread is taking a very strange and amusing turn, is it not? --FLO--

[A-1 (imported)]

This thread is taking a very strange and amusing turn, is it not? --FLO--

er... make that an ABUSING turn....

I remember reading that, after a battle in the Middle Ages in Central Asia, the winning commander had the scrotums removed from the enemy dead, and the sacs were tanned and made into a tent. Don't know how big a tent. The name that comes to mind regarding this, is Tamerlane, but it doesn't seem like the kind of thing he would have done. Don't remember where I read the story.

...reminds me of the old joke about the Moyel (http://parenting.ivillage.com/newborn/n ... 4z,00.html) who save up the forskings and had them made into a changepurse to give to his wife for the trip to America by boat. The wife explained how she would have rather had some luggage to which the Moyel replied, "...not to worry. Rub it and it will turn into a steamer trunk."

It would take me a while to dig out my old recipes for tanning liqueur (really, that's what they call it), but I'll see if I can find them. Used to tan rabbit hides as a kid....

.

...hmm, tanning licker, that's what I wanted to do to some young ladies that I saw who was going into a sun tan shop last week... yum, yum! You know, there is not a DAMNED thing wrong with young and tight...

:shakemitk

...

who used to remove the scrotum from all men who were hanged in the prison. He had them tanned and turned into tobacco pouches.

What a shape he didn't makereservations for a CIGAR tube, seeing how the material was going to rot otherwise...

rapidly expose the typical walrus' lack

of endowment in financial matters.....

.

Hmmm. Should I talk to Rosie a

bout her hiring one for a personal financial planner?

If you do watch her around that cane of yours...she just might divorce you and claim it as HER property...

I understand that better results can be achieved with a small device when employed by an expert than by a much larger one in the hands of someone with a poor technique.

AND

And we humans are stuck with descriptions similar to Napolean's genitals stored somewhere: small dried object.

Well, I have met some people that can do some AMAZING things...er...well, let us just call them...SILVER-TONGUED DEVILS...



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