Discussion 1: Is the EA no longer friendly?

[kb57z (imported)]

I'd agree with Tugon's point about the negative effect of the last hacking incident.

Also, it's worth remembering that the "tone" of the whole place has changed because the membership has. I would vigorously refute any attempt to label the change as either "good" or "bad"; it is simply change. It's like a long-running soap opera, with old characters being written out and new ones appearing (and perhaps where the scriptwriters aren't paying attention to the "Previously on the Eunuch Archive".) The newcomers don't know all the back history and so don't realise what underlies some of the interactions with (and between) the "old timers", nor why there are things that provoke a vigorous response from the moderators.

[jemagirl (imported)]

It's like a long-running soap opera, with old characters being written out and new ones appearing (and perhaps where the scriptwriters aren't paying attention to the "Previously on the Eunuch Archive".)

LOL

I this analogy I play the standard sopa opera role of the character that mysteriously disappears with out explanation, only to reappear many seasons later as if nothing had happened. Later it will come out that I was in some funky cult and escaped leaving every thing behind.

[Slammr (imported)]

I'd agree with Tugon's point about the negative effect of the last hacking incident.

Also, it's worth remembering that the "tone" of the whole place has changed because the membership has. I would vigorously refute any attempt to label the change as either "good" or "bad"; it is simply change. It's like a long-running soap opera, with old characters being written out and new ones appearing (and perhaps where the scriptwriters aren't paying attention to the "Previously on the Eunuch Archive".) The newcomers don't know all the back history and so don't realise what underlies some of the interactions with (and between) the "old timers", nor why there are things that provoke a vigorous response from the moderators.

I like this post, and I agree with it. It's not so much that EA is "less friendly," but that it's changed; and it can't help but change. The message board is but a reflection of the people that make it up, and as they change -- as old members leave and new ones arrive -- the tone of the board will change. No way to change that or necessarily should it be changed. I realize that what I miss about the old EA is some of the people that are no longer around, and there's nothing anyone can do to change that.

Too, I've changed. I'm still interested enough to pay almost daily visits and to read a few posts, but most of them, I mark "read" and move on. Also I don't write as many castration stories as I once did. After castrating a few hundred males -- probably more -- in my stories, it's hard to come up with a new way to do it. And I spend more time these days creating CGI art than I do writing text stories. So if I indicated that EA is a less friendly place, I'll take that back. It's different, but not necessarily less friendly.

[BossTamsin (imported)]

Everyone, your responses are great. Just fantastic. I'm currently going through them and making notes on things to think about. There have been a LOT of very good points raised, and there is a lot to think about in here.

While obviously I can't please everyone, I see it as my job to see to it that as many users as possible enjoy the site and keep coming back. That includes the moderators, too. Without them, this place would be one hell of a lot harder to run.

Please keep sharing your thoughts. This is a community, and every little bit helps.

[BudleyBare (imported)]

I voted in the poll earlier in this past week, but refrained from adding any comments until I had time to noodle this matter yet again. I say "yet again" because I previously (mid-2006) had to walk away from EA for personal reasons, and that hiatus lasted several months. Those reasons were primarily personal, but there was a bit of the need based on the content of this board. I will admit that the political discussions and personal attacks here on EA were a factor in my decision to step aside for a while.

What follows is where I am today.

I no longer visit EA on a daily basis. Initially when I was unexpectedly becoming a castrated male, I visited several times a day (after I was out of the hospitals and thinking more rationally). I needed and wanted to know everything I could learn about loosing first one and then ultimately my second testicle. The information AND SUPPORT found here was invaluable. And then the personal stresses continued to increase (mostly related to my mother's status and declining condition), and I stepped aside for quite a while.

After quite a while, I did return, and I then would visit at least once every other day, and sometimes every day, but only for a quick check. It was when I returned to the EA that I actually stopped reading *all* of the new postings, as I had previously done. My prior experiences with the political discussions and the sometimes personal attacks was a strong moderating factor for me. I did not, and still do not understand why off-topic discussions (according to my viewpoint as to what off-topic subjects include) are not only tolerated, but actually encouraged here -- witness the last dedicated category with four forums for politics, jokes, computers, etc. To my way of thinking, this web site is about testicles and penises, not jokes, politics and similar subjects. To have a small "injection" of an off-topic as a sidebar to an on-topic discussion is quite acceptable.

I am not opposed to political discussions, for instance, but I believe they do not belong here. I do understand that we are all human beings, doing what we each do, and that those subjects are part of our lives and interests. However, if I read a book about mathematics, I do not expect, nor accept, that because the author also has an interest in "xxx" that I am to be subjected to those other interests. You can say that I am not required to read the off-topic postings (and I never have been), but it just is not, to my way of thinking, even appropriate for off-topic postings to be here.

After a good deal of meditation (witness a long time during my recent trip to Antarctica), I have come to the realization that my feelings are my "stuff", and I don't wish to impose any censorship on others. I would not have even put these thoughts into writing had it not been for this poll and solicitation for feedback. I do understand that each of us is unique, with many diverse issues and interests, etc.

And so today I check EA once a week, sometimes twice a week, just to keep in touch and see if there is anything of interest from or for our fellow members. I now continue NOT to read the off-topic postings. I now continue to cringe when reading an on-topic posting and find a personal attack (but those have been far fewer in the past several months).

The bottom line here is that I believe the EA management team needs to be very clear as to what the purpose of EA is, and to state it unambiguously right up at the top of the forum, and to make it a required acknowledgment during the registration process. And then enforce it. That way there is full disclosure in advance, and people will know what it is that they are opting into. In my particular case, even if I knew in advance of the off-topic content, I still would have registered because I was desperate to get all the information I could about what I was undergoing.

The most important comment that I wish to make here is that I genuinely appreciate everything that EA has done for me, and especially for the efforts of the management team (changing as it has in my short 16 months as a registered member). You guys (gals?) do an incredible job and take a lot of crap. Regardless of what you decide to change, if anything, I respect you and the decisions that you make, and appreciate what you have chosen to do for those in need.

[calmeilles (imported)]

The thing is that in any on-line forum that coheres around a topic there develops a degree of community, people begin to know each other to a degree and have conversations that stray far away from the central topic.

People will talk politics or religion or cat grooming for that matter so the practical choices are providing a place where that can be done without obscuring the central topic or trying to forbid it and necessarily penalise people who contravene da roolz.

As a recent joiner it seems to me that the topic and sub-topic structure works well. It's clear where most things should go and while I tend to read everything it should be possible for people to avoid the topics they don't wish to see as long as posters respect the topic areas and here that seems to be the case.

[Beau Geste (imported)]

I don't know if it would help or not, but some of the message boards I participate in, have a regular set of rules posted, so everybody knows what's okay and what isn't. As far as I can tell, there isn't any set of rules posted as to what types of posts are acceptable on this archive, what kind of behavior is okay in the chatroom, and so on. I don't actually see much difference in tone and in "worthwhileness" between boards on websites with posted rules and message boards on those without them--but maybe a clear set of rules or guidelines would make a difference. As I've commented in other posts, I think civility is one of the more important considerations in building a sense of good will and community. And someone who has a generally civil attitude, shouldn't have to be told how to be nice. But some people do have to be told.

As to how much fun a website is--I don't know, I think a lot of it is what you make of it. One point I might make, and one that stands out especially for someone like myself, who doesn't find the thought of violence against the sex organs to be exciting; is, that, after a while, people must become jaded to that sort of thing. Maybe that's why the Archive isn't as much fun for some as it once was: after you read a certain amount of this stuff, you've seen and vicariously experienced every variety of what can be written and otherwise communicated about castration, and there's nothing further to experience.

For myself, I came here while clicking on links at BME, which I had gone to, to find information about tattoo removal. (I don't have any tattoos, but that's another story.) I found the EA site interesting, simply because it differed so much from most of the websites I access. But what I actually found worthwhile, in an enduring way, was the portions of the archive that aren't specifically castration-related. Of course, these are the sections where the most negative stuff gets posted, but I have spent so many years reading flames and bad-mouth posts, that they all bounce off me any more. To me, anything that is interesting is fun, and the cellar and political sections are fun because of the variety in them. I long ago learned not to get into nasty exchanges, so I usually just ignore negative replies to my posts. And, actually, some of the guys who seem to be quite sensitive and reflective (e.g., Blaise and Dingbat) also appear capable of taking some hard hits and coming back with good posts.

At the same time, this website is a learning site for me, and I have been introduced here to some things I would never have imagined had I not accessed the Archive.

I really haven't been here long enough, and probably haven't been involved enough in the fantasy and "thrill" sections of the board, to assess whether the archive has deteriorated. But I can tell you that there are plenty of other websites where people are more combative than most folks are here.

I don't know if members are given warnings before they are banned, but perhaps some would shape up if they knew they would be booted if they didn't.

[genderless (imported)]

I had to vote a little less friendly. Even though I'm new here, my gut feeling and what I've read so far brought me to this opinion.