Penis cut off in London restaurant

[eunuch2001 (imported)]

Here's a new approach to self-penectomy.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/engl ... 586879.stm

Happy reading guys.

[kristoff]

Man cuts off penis in restaurant

A man cut off his penis with a knife in a packed London restaurant.

Police were forced to use CS gas to restrain the man when they entered the Zizzi restaurant in The Strand on Sunday evening.

A Metropolitan Police spokeswoman said the man was aged between 30 and 40 and that his injuries were self-inflicted.

The man was then taken to hospital in south London where his condition is stable. It is understood surgeons were unable to reattach his penis.

A spokeswoman for Zizzi said the man was not thought to have any connection with the restaurant.

She said: "At around 9pm on Sunday, a man walked into the Zizzi restaurant on The Strand, down the stairs to the basement restaurant area and tried to enter a kitchen.

"Members of staff stopped him, at which he ran into a second kitchen area.

"The man then picked up a kitchen knife and slashed himself across the wrist and groin areas before running back into the restaurant, where he continued to stab himself.

"This happened in a matter of seconds and was obviously extremely frightening and distressing for the many customers and staff in the restaurant at the time."

She added: "Apart from the man, we understand that no-one else suffered any physical injuries."

Story from BBC NEWS:

http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/u ... 586879.stm

Published: 2007/04/24 09:57:23 GMT

(c) BBC MMVII

[IbPervert (imported)]

Then the waiter said, "We have one order of stuffed wiener if anyone is interested."

[Allen (imported)]

Hey, waiter ... I'd like to place an order! And can I get eggs with that?

Er actually, I really wouldn't mind adding mine to the menu.

[IbPervert (imported)]

Would you like your eggs scrambled, poached, sunny side up or still attached?

[castratofan (imported)]

Although the spelling is different - I noticed the restaurant is called Zizzi. One of the French slang words for penis is zizi

I wonder if he knew

[ganym3d3s (imported)]

once over easy...and make em...sing!

[Losethem (imported)]

I think I've seen a ghost.

[Valery_V (imported)]

I think I've seen a ghost.

It was very hungry a ghost

[Paolo]

A 14 year old ghost of a thread.

[Valery_V (imported)]

Chinese customs officials seize over 7,200 human penises on ship from Nigeria

Source:

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/chines ... m-nigeria/

[Paolo]

7,221?! You'd think someone would have noticed this before now?!

Chinese customs officers have made the world's biggest seizure of human organs in history this morning, a total of 7,221 penises of African origin hidden in a refrigerated freight container.

Acting on information from an anonymous informer, Chinese officers found the organs in 36 boxes labelled as plantains (cooking bananas) inside a refrigerated container on a ship harboured in the Shanghai Port.

Chinese General Administration of Customs spokesman, Li Wu, says an increasingly large number of armed groups in Africa use organ trafficking to finance themselves, making such seizures predictable.

"These organs are common commodities now, but they were certainly harvested in unsanitary conditions or contaminated at some point, so we can't let them out on the Chinese market."

Mr. Li says the organs were shipped from Lagos in Nigeria but may have only transited through that country and could possibly originate from elsewhere in Africa.

"We know that penises from Lybia and Sudan fetch a higher price than those from other African war zones, but can't presume of their origin before the end of the investigation."

The Chinese General Administration of Customs says similar seizures may become more common over the next few years as armed groups in Africa turn to organ trafficking to finance their military operations.

Human penises were seized in nine cases since 2002, but today's find represents more than four times the amount seized by customs officers over the past 18 years.

Describing the organ's value as high as illegal drugs, he said that "specimens of this size" usually fetched around $160,000 each on the black market, and its total value was more than $1.15 billion.

The ship's crew, four Nigerians, two Malians and two Cameronese are being detained for interrogation, but no charges have yet been filed against them.

[ganym3d3s (imported)]

Oh gawd.....where's my smelling salts...just think....american beauty scene instead of rose petals...falling dismembered BBCs.....ooohhh..

[Valery_V (imported)]

7,221?! You'd think someone would have noticed this before now?!

Chinese customs officers have made the world's biggest seizure of human organs in history this morning, a total of 7,221 penises of African origin hidden in a refrigerated freight container.

Acting on information from an anonymous informer, Chinese officers found the organs in 36 boxes labelled as plantains (cooking bananas) inside a refrigerated container on a ship harboured in the Shanghai Port.

Chinese General Administration of Customs spokesman, Li Wu, says an increasingly large number of armed groups in Africa use organ trafficking to finance themselves, making such seizures predictable.

"These organs are common commodities now, but they were certainly harvested in unsanitary conditions or contaminated at some point, so we can't let them out on the Chinese market."

Mr. Li says the organs were shipped from Lagos in Nigeria but may have only transited through that country and could possibly originate from elsewhere in Africa.

"We know that penises from Lybia and Sudan fetch a higher price than those from other African war zones, but can't presume of their origin before the end of the investigation."

The Chinese General Administration of Customs says similar seizures may become more common over the next few years as armed groups in Africa turn to organ trafficking to finance their military operations.

Human penises were seized in nine cases since 2002, but today's find represents more than four times the amount seized by customs officers over the past 18 years.

Describing the organ's value as high as illegal drugs, he said that "specimens of this size" usually fetched around $160,000 each on the black market, and its total value was more than $1.15 billion.

The ship's crew, four Nigerians, two Malians and two Cameronese are being detained for interrogation, but no charges have yet been filed against them.

I just am horrified! Cannibalism as business. From other sources: parts of a body were withdrawn from living people! What fate of people from whom these parts of a body were withdrawn? For certain they were not treated...

[Losethem (imported)]

Chinese customs officials seize over 7,200 human penises on ship from Nigeria

Source:

https://worldnewsdailyreport.com/chines ... m-nigeria/

World News Daily Report

Really?

The same satire site which gives us headlines like:

NEW JERSEY BROTHER AND SISTER ALLOWED TO MARRY AFTER 10-YEAR-LONG COURT BATTLE

WOMAN SUES SAMSUNG FOR $1.8M AFTER CELL PHONE GETS STUCK INSIDE HER VAGINA

ELDERLY COUPLE ACCIDENTALLY BURNS HOUSE DOWN DURING SEX GAME INVOLVING WW2 FLAMETHROWER

AUSTRALIAN JUDGE RULES IN FAVOR OF HUSBAND IN DIVORCE SETTLEMENT "SEX WITH KANGAROO IS NOT CHEATING"

Here is one written about Roger's past

COPS BEAT UP TEEN AFTER BANK TELLER MISTAKES HIS ERECTION FOR A PISTOL

And here is one about Roger's new girlfriend

NIGERIAN COURT DETERMINES WOMAN WITH 8-INCH LONG CLITORIS IS LEGALLY A MAN

[Valery_V (imported)]

The sir, unfortunately is not a fake! I checked this message on different sources...

[Valery_V (imported)]

The sir, your scepticism calms a little. Thank you! Messages began to appear that you are right. Though suspicions that in the mentioned countries, something is possible similar, remain.

[Losethem (imported)]

World News Daily Report is definitely a satire site. No question about it.