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From conversations with medical personnel and from my own experiences with my mother, it is a fact that Alzheimer's patients can be very combattive and aggressive. This makes dealing with them very tricky and takes a lot of patience. They can also suffer delusions and it can be impossible to convince them otherwise.

I was fortunate that the family had enough money to allow for my mother to be properly cared for in an institution dedicated to serving Alzheimer's patients. Hone care is very demanding of the caregiver and is fraught with problems. Medications are helpful but very expensive.

While I am saddened by the loss of my mother, I am also gladdened by knowing that her ordeal has ended.

Mom had two psychotic episodes yesterday. In both instances she was screaming for the police because I wouldn't let in all five of our show dogs from the outside (we only have two dogs, both German Shepherds, and neither are show dogs.

She tried to go to the backyard at 9:00pm last night. Our backyard is risky enough in the daytime with all the little holes my dogs have dug out. I had to hold on to her to prevent her from going out the back door. She says I hurt her sore arm more when I held her.

She said, "this is my house and I'll go outside anytime I want to, day or night." Well, she's partially right. It is her house.

She refused to take all her blood pressure medicine as well.

Damn I can't wait till the Conservatorship Hearing in May. It being in force wouldn't have changed last nights events however.

Though, I'm hoping with Conservatorship, I can get a Reverse Mortgage to afford another caregiver, at least a parttime one, so the caregiver can take some of the abuse and give me a few hours off a week.

Also, we're a month behind every month in utility bills and with the Reverge Mortgage income I could catch up.

On the negative = I hate my life.

On the positive = At least I have my Computer, Internet, TV, VCR, DietCoke and Tobacco. They aid me in maintaining a relative state of sanity.

There's that old saying: "Everyone one in the world is crazy but me and thee and now I wonder about thee." I'd have to modify the last part by saying, "and now I'm wondering about me."

When I served mom her usual breakfast of eggs, toast and bacon, she was in a bad mood and threw it on the floor. I cooked her a second breakfast and, thank gawd, she decided to eat it.

If I wasn't living this life I'd say it would make a great situation comedy. How about "Mac and Momma?"

Eh...probably wouldn't sell.

Kangan (imported) wrote: Wed Apr 11, 2007 7:09 am From conversations with medical personnel and from my own experiences with my mother, it is a fact that Alzheimer's patients can be very combattive and aggressive. This makes dealing with them very tricky and takes a lot of patience. They can also suffer delusions and it can be impossible to convince them otherwise.

I was fortunate that the family had enough money to allow for my mother to be properly cared for in an institution dedicated to serving Alzheimer's patients. Hone care is very demanding of the caregiver and is fraught with problems. Medications are helpful but very expensive.

While I am saddened by the loss of my mother, I am also gladdened by knowing that her ordeal has ended.

What a horrible illness. I admire those who have taken on the burden of caring for its victims. They too are victims. Thank you for sharing accounts of your experiences. I am sorry for the loss of your mother.

Kangan,

I feel bad for you and happy, all at the same time. Remember the good times.

River

Blaise (imported) wrote: Thu Apr 12, 2007 3:50 am What a horrible illness. I admire those who have taken on the burden of caring for its victims. They too are victims. Thank you for sharing accounts of your experiences. I am sorry for the loss of your mother.

I had it fairly easy in comparison - how MactheWolf can stand it is beyond me. Sounds like Momma badly needs some anti-psychotic drugs.

Hugs.

Kangan

I truly wish her doctor would prescribe some anti-psychotic drugs that might help and, at the same time, be safe for a 92 year old to take without more than minor physical detriment.

Mac,

You sure have your hands full and I give you credit for helping your mother. Not many people will do what your are doing for her, even though she may not appreciate it.

My wife was sick for 14 years and her mother was in a nursing home with dementia.

My wife passed away when I was 60 and she was 52 and her mother a year later. My whole life has changed especially financially for the good, Bobbie knows about that, I am 65 and looking at another job with good $$ for a change and feel great.

Mac I really wish you the best and will pray for you. If I can be of any help let me know. If I had your phone # I could call as my vonage line lets me call 24/7 toll free. Email your # if you wish and a good time to call.

Mac,

tome (imported) wrote: Sun Apr 15, 2007 12:02 pm You sure have your hands full and I give you credit for helping your mother. Not many people will do what your are doing for her, even though she may not appreciate it.

My wife was sick for 14 years and her mother was in a nursing home with dementia.

My wife passed away when I was 60 and she was 52 and her mother a year later. My whole life has changed especially financially for the good, Bobbie knows about that, I am 65 and looking at another job with good $$ for a change and feel great.

Mac I really wish you the best and will pray for you. If I can be of any help let me know. If I had your phone # I could call as my vonage line lets me call 24/7 toll free. Email your # if you wish and a good time to call.

Your encouragement for Mac delights me. Thank you for offering it.

Mac,

Hang in there. If she is 92 (like my mother was), this situation cannot go on forever. Your mother's symptoms seem very much those of my mother before she had to be moved to an institution.

There are drugs that can help, but they are very expensive.

Hugs.

Tnis morning I received a call from a Court Investigator who said he was coming by tomorrow to check on mom, the house and my fitness to be her conservator. I'll let you know the results tomorrow.

I''ll spend this day sprucing up the house despite the fact my migraine feels like a 9.2 on the Richter scale. Well here goes nothing.

As I was driving to get more dog food, I noticed the car was leaking water like a sieve. I bought some duct tape to see if that "might" seal the leak If it doesn't work, I'll buy some of that sealent that you put into the radiator for leaks. If that fails to stop the leak, I'll have to wait till the first of the month and get a new heater hose which means I might be walking till then.

To quote Erma Bombeck, "if life is such a bowl of cherries, why am I (and millions of others) living in the pits

WEll....

Red Green's duct tape did noting to slow the leak.

But the radiator sealent seems to be working so all is right with the world for the moment

Mac,

I wish everything the best for you in your present situation.

Take it a day at a time and it will work out if you let it go.

Its hard to do but it worked for me with my wifes issues and constant $$ problems.

The Court Investigator just left and seemed satisified, He was very pleasant and businesslike. He asked mom several questions and she gave the correct answers as far as I heard. Mom said she wanted me, her only offspring and relative in this state, to make medical decisions for her and to care for her. I showed him he meds but all he was nterested in was ner nerve pills (Xanax) and her sleeping pills (Ambien).

He stayed about ten minutes and left. He seemed satisified with both her and mine responses.

MacTheWolf (imported) wrote: Wed Apr 25, 2007 5:53 am The Court Investigator just left and seemed satisified, He was very pleasant and businesslike. He asked mom several questions and she gave the correct answers as far as I heard. Mom said she wanted me, her only offspring and relative in this state, to make medical decisions for her and to care for her. I showed him he meds but all he was nterested in was ner nerve pills (Xanax) and her sleeping pills (Ambien).

He stayed about ten minutes and left. He seemed satisified with both her and mine responses.

Good. Now you probably need a water pump.

Yay! Sounds like things are looking up, eh? Good deal!

Somebody, anybody...just shoot me...please.

I just spent the last 2.4 hours looking for a three-ring-binder filled with typed notes on stuff I had taped. I thought maybe I mislabeled the binder and went through all 103 of my binders but couldn't find it. I looked behind bookcases, under several tables, on top of any place I thought it might be. Couldn't find it. I thought I was going to have to re-type all 134 pages again...a long task for me as I type with right index finger only.

I was at my wit's end when I decided to pour myself a cold drink of my favorite poison (Diet Coke), light up my pipe, sat in an easy chair and tried to meditate on the problem.

Ten minutes later the answer hit light a stroke of lightning. I went to a file on my computer and suddenly realized, the reason I couldn't find the binder of 134 typed pages was.........ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? .....

I had not yet typed them up yet so there was no such binder in existence...yet.

Sheesh...and I sometimes think my mom is brain-dead. I was for 2.5 hours. Hmmmm I hope it's not catching.

I HOPE your day went better than 2.5 hours of mine did

Mac,

you know that if you actually Save the document you type, if you loose the paper copy you can always reprint it.

Just my $0.02 worth

Ken

MacTheWolf (imported) wrote: Thu Apr 26, 2007 11:02 am Somebody, anybody...just shoot me...please.

I just spent the last 2.4 hours looking for a three-ring-binder filled with typed notes on stuff I had taped. I thought maybe I mislabeled the binder and went through all 103 of my binders but couldn't find it. I looked behind bookcases, under several tables, on top of any place I thought it might be. Couldn't find it. I thought I was going to have to re-type all 134 pages again...a long task for me as I type with right index finger only.

I was at my wit's end when I decided to pour myself a cold drink of my favorite poison (Diet Coke), light up my pipe, sat in an easy chair and tried to meditate on the problem.

Ten minutes later the answer hit light a stroke of lightning. I went to a file on my computer and suddenly realized, the reason I couldn't find the binder of 134 typed pages was.........ARE YOU READY FOR THIS? .....

I had not yet typed them up yet so there was no such binder in existence...yet.

Sheesh...and I sometimes think my mom is brain-dead. I was for 2.5 hours. Hmmmm I hope it's not catching.

I HOPE your day went better than 2.5 hours of mine did

Welcome to my world!

So much for false assumptions.

I was hoping May was going to be better than April moneywise. But then I checked the balance of mom's account which I thought would say $20.00. To my shock it read minus $259.00.

Apparently a check paid to a utility was held back and thinking it was paid, I wrote grocery checks on it. So this month I start with $260.00 less.

Life doesn't suck but comes close at times

Don't forget to figure in the OVERDRAFT penalties.

They vary from bank to bank...

Mac, have they added in any bank charges for going overdrawn?

If they have, you might be able to get them to refund them to you if you explain the situation to them. I have no idea how it works in the US but, over here, if you get charged for something (such as going overdrawn without permission or going over your existing overdraft facility), you can often get the charges reimbursed if you give them a call (I've done it myself and the bank HAS given me back the charges). Again, I don't know about the US, but here the charges can be VERY expensive and so it's always worth trying to get them reimbursed.

Methinks it depends on the bank. I do my banking with a major bank and also with a credit union. The major bank doesn't like to do it but will do up to three per year if you argue the point well enough.. The credit union reversed one for me once, and it wasn't quite as much of a hassle. It really depends on the bank and which bank employee you talk to.

That's interesting to hear Daughter. I must admit that I've argued over bank charges a number of times (too many to admit to publicly!) and, on every single occasion, the bank has reimbursed me amazingly enough.

Mind you, this might be because I'm a persistently irritating person who rather enjoys playing the passive-aggressive routine with faceless institutions!