How old were you when you understood what was castration ?

[Bibiballs]

I was about 10 when I was told that the cat had a surgery to avoid breeding. But with no detailed explanation.

Later at about 12, I knew that some cattle were also castrated.

At about 14, I knew the signification of "eunuch" and as most of the male teenagers I was afraid loosing my balls and dick.

At 26 I've seen for the first time castration of horses.
It was a strange experience and a strange feeling I had.

[NaturalEunuch]

I learned about dogs and cats getting "fixed" when I was a kid. I first learned what eunuchs are in church. It wasn't until I was in my 40s before I started wondering what it would be like to actually become a eunuch myself. Just an abstract thought at the time.

Years after that, the big breakthrough came. I discovered the original Eunuch Archive and found thousands of others who felt as I do. And not only was there an awesome amount of information, but I was given a roadmap to move forward.

It was a long process. 1) DISCOVERY to 2) INTEREST to 3) DESIRE to 4) ACTION.

I hope our new EAv3 can be the resource to inspire the next generation of voluntary eunuchs to move forward in their journeys.

[eddie]

当我10岁的的时候，我阅读到法国大革命中的断头台，并对其颇感兴趣。于是我用橡皮泥捏了一个小人，它有着头、四肢和一条硕大的屌，再用两根铅笔和一个卡纸做成断头台的样子，砍掉了小人的头。之后我又砍掉了小人的四肢，并最后砍掉小人的屌。神奇的是，我砍掉屌的时候竟然有一丝快感，于是我反复接上这段橡皮泥，又反复砍掉，这便是我对阉割最初的感觉。

When I was 10 years old, I read about the guillotine in the French Revolution and was quite interested in it. So I made a little man out of plasticine, with a head, limbs and a huge dick, and used two pencils and a cardboard to make a guillotine, and cut off the little man's head. Then I cut off the little man's limbs and finally cut off the little man's dick. The magical thing is that I felt a little pleasure when I cut off the dick, so I repeatedly connected this piece of plasticine and cut it off again and again. This was my first feeling about castration.

当我13岁的时候，阅读到有关司马迁的故事。司马迁受了宫刑，忍辱负重写下史记。于是我对宫刑又产生了好奇，到网上搜索有关宫刑的资料，了解到古代宫刑的步骤。当我一点一点阅读的时候，我的鸡巴反应特别明显，变得特别硬，这也塑造了我对阉割的认知。

When I was 13 years old, I read about Sima Qian. Sima Qian was castrated and wrote the Records of the Grand Historian with humiliation. So I became curious about castration again, and searched for information about castration on the Internet and learned about the steps of castration in ancient times. As I read bit by bit, my dick reacted very obviously and became very hard, which also shaped my understanding of castration.

[Bibiballs]

I never even though that it could be possible to learn about eunuch in a church.
Because I'm starting to have erectile disfunction I'm sometimes wondering what will be my life being castrated.
With Internet I've also discovered that I'm not the only one thinking of castration.

eddie the thought of castration make your dick hard.
What if it was you ?
When I was younger the thought of circumcision make my dick erected.

[NaturalEunuch]

I never even though that it could be possible to learn about eunuch in a church.
Because I'm starting to have erectile disfunction I'm sometimes wondering what will be my life being castrated.
With Internet I've also discovered that I'm not the only one thinking of castration.

There are mentions of eunuchs all over the Bible. For example, Matthew 19:12 says, "For there are eunuchs who were born that way, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by others, and there are those who choose to live like eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it." That quote is attributed to Jesus Christ, by the way.

Thanks to the Internet, we are finding that there are thousands of people interested in castration and eunuchdom. It's a real eye-opener.

[dandelion]

I remember I was in grade 5 or 6 and we were discussing on the school bus how the Chinese eunuchs were castrated. I thought they only removed the testicles but then my classmates told me they had everything removed.

[Bibiballs]

Yes in the bible eunuchs are mentioned but were you able to understand the meaning of the word ?

My question was about castration. If we don't know what is castration it is difficult to understand what is really an eunuch. And as dandelion say eunuchs in China have also the dick cut off.

To be castrated is different from having the dick cut off.

I didn't grew up in the countryside where it is more common to see castrated animals than in urban areas where castration is for pets.

[NaturalEunuch]

Yes in the bible eunuchs are mentioned but were you able to understand the meaning of the word ?

All I know is that was the first time I heard the word 'eunuch' was in church and I wasn't confused, so they probably explained what eunuchs are during a sermon or something. I don't remember. All I knew was getting "fixed" and castration were the same thing for our pets. I still didn't know much else about it at the time. I also didn't know that most historical eunuchs also had their penises cut off too.

Later, like almost everyone else it seems, castration became kind of a sexual fantasy for me. But the more I learned about it, the more I realized I wanted it for real. There were a lot of frustrating obstacles along the way, but eventually I got there.

[Bibiballs]

To me as a teenager or later as a young man castration was more something I fear than a sexuel fantasy.

But I have to admit that when I read stories and information about it I was a little bit confused. My mind focused on the procedure and I imagined I was the guy going to be castrated. My penis reacted but I can't say if it was because of desire or fear.

Did you talk to your females partners about the fantasy.
You have waited for long time but now you seem to be happy to be castrated.

[Stallion]

I was 4 when I understood what castration is.
I am a farmer's son, and my father was very good at knocking the balls of male animals.
So back in those days we had a growing herd of cows that were the descendants of the milkers that were kept to supply the family's needs. We didn't have enough cows to warrant having our own bull, so a neighbour was more than happy to park his Hereford bull at our place when he didn't need it. But it also meant that the calves would be all different ages. The cattle were yarded, and everyone went over to the house to have a "cuppa" while the fire for the banding irons built up.

As a young kids will I went back to the yards to watch the cattle. One of the cows was on heat and the two oldest calves were male and virtually young bulls, they certainly had the equipment and in the crush of the mob he was able to give the cow a good serving even though it was against her will. It was a sight to see, his young hard cock half out and dripping semen as the panted and fort to get his seed into the cow.
The men arrived back from smoko, and he soon found himself lassoed and hauled over to a post, his big balls swinging as he fort the inevitable. Soon he was on the ground and stretched out and two big balls were hanging there until dad got hold of them. They seemed to bust out of their bag when the knife slit it open like they wanted to escape and soon enough they were free on thrown over to the fence where I went and grabbed one of them, the dog got the other one.
I'm pretty sure my castration fetish stems from that day. It particularly turns me on to see a man getting hold of another man's balls the way my dad got hold of that young bull.

[attis]

I was about 6 when...

[Bidragonmaster]

Probably 8 or 9 when I had to catch piglets for dad to cut them. Spring time was holding the calves down while Dad used the burdizzo. Discovered my sadist side in highschool so castration was a natural addition over the years.

[fusion]

I was about 6 when I learnt what castration was, my family had just bought a kitten and dad wanted it desexed.

[globot06]

i understand your feelings i do enjoy another man having hold of my balls not knowing what comes next but where i live castration is virtually impossible to have done

[Friotler7]

I think I know about it since 8. But I developed a fetish for it when I by 13. I saw the terrific scene of "I spit in your grave", where she crushes Her violator's balls in a vice. After that, I started searching for the subject and fantasizing about it, but always having it in the back of my mind.

[Pup4dad]

Probably around my late teens. It isn't talked about much, so I never realised

[photoglenn]

Being that I am now nearly 78 years of age, I have no recollection (aka "memory") of when I first learned about the meaning of castration.

During the puberty years, long before there was an internet, and books in the library had very scant information about the cause and effect of puberty, or any connection to testosterone, once I learned the connection, and that the testosterone in my balls was contributing to my emotional distress of puberty, it was at that point when I wished they were gone.

I had no intent or desire to have them removed, aka "castration", but I just wished they were gone so I could be released from puberty purgatory.

This memory stayed with me for a lifetime.

My first experience with low testosterone was after my balls experience a serious bacterial infection that became inflamed and extremely painful.

There is a medical term for what it was, but it was serious enough that I felt like my balls were being squeezed all day long.

Eventually the antibiotic kicked in and the infection, and pain subsided.

It was at that time that Testosterone Gel was prescribed, as my balls were apparently so damaged by the infection that they stopped producing testosterone.

A couple of years later, they became infected again, possibly from a urinary backflow and not an STD.

They were not as painful this time, and another 2 weeks of antibiotic was performed.

After this second infection my balls got very small, very hard, and when squeezed, they experienced no pain.

I left it at that for a couple of years, infertile, no testosterone, but did experience a normal lust for sex, and ability to perform.

However, I started to get groin pain, not testicle pain, and it was becoming so much of a bother that I was taking Tylenol, day and night.

Well, after awhile, and realizing that constant use of Tyenol would lead to other negative health problems, I mentioned this to my Primary Care Physician.

He referred me to a urologist who ordered an ultrasound exam of my testicles.
A very large woman, probably in her 20s, performed the exam .
I will always remember the look on her face as the did the ultrasound scan.
She probably thought she did the scan wrong, so did it again.
She left the room for a moment, returned, and concluded the exam .

The results as determined by my urologist was that my testicles were "infarcted" , meaning no blood flowing into or out of them, so basically "dead balls".

He recommended that they be removed to avoid any future possibility of cancer developing in them.

My memory of my earlier desire to have no balls, and the possibility of cancer, made the choice obvious; take them out.
He did a scrotal incision and removed them.

He never did mention prosthetic replacements.

It was only afterwards that I learned of procedures to remove them via an incision in the lower abdomen instead of the scrotum.
I wondered why he didi a scrotal removal; after some research I learned that lower abdominal removal is more tedious and risky, and is generally used in cases when cancer is already present.

And after some research I learned that prosthetic testicles can be a potential problem during their residency in the scrotum.
Problems can lead to another surgery to do repairs, remove them completely, or replace them.
As I am adverse to surgery, and since I have no personal need for prosthetic testicles, I am glad that my urologist did not mention or offer them at the time of my surgery.

Even though the result has been the realization of an early in life desire, it has taken me several years to adapt emotionally.
I had given no thought to the term eunuch, and once I realized I was not one, it had been difficult to transition from a gay male, to a gay male eunuch.

While my sexual abilities were functioning normally after the surgery, after a year, I became impotent.
My doctor prescribed an ED medication but it had no result, which is fine as the medication can also have negative side effects.

So, as previously posted, my partner, now husband, of 54 years, and I are still in love, but no longer have any sexual encounters.
I really can't blame him as one of the main enjoyments of gay sex is enjoying it for yourself, and helping your partner to enjoy it also.

With no balls, and no erection, I probably would not be interested in engaging in a sexual encounter either.

Kind of like "What's The Point" (pun intended).

Knowledge of my castration is known only to my doctors, my husband, and one very special very trusted gay male friend of many years who only knows that the surgery was a result from medical necessity, and who I have not told, and will not tell, that it is something that has fulfilled a life long desire.

Some secrets are best left as secrets, within our own minds, and since posting here is anonymous, I have no problem with sharing it "publicly" .

[Friotler7]

Thanks for sharing your story. May I ask how old were you when you had your castration?

[gayman]

Before puberty when i was 6 - 7 yo.

[Bibiballs]

In addition to the main question :
How did you felt when you understood what was castration ?

[Friotler7]

In addition to the main question :
How did you felt when you understood what was castration ?

I can't remember that, but it probably didn't took long for me to feel aroused by it. When I was 10-12, I used to look myself naked at the mirror, imagining how it would be much more beautiful without those parts between my legs, like Silver Surfer. I hided them in my hand and behind legs. But I wasn't really aroused by that until I was 13 or 14.

[doingmybest]

I was about 11 when I was first exposed to harmful/abusive (really bad stuff) sexual content online. I was trafficked for most of my childhood online. I was about 14 when I first understood the word eunuch in the Bible. I’ve pretty consistently wanted to be a eunuch my entire life but haven’t been able to afford it. When nonbinary became a legal gender I immediately signed up for transition surgery. I didn’t know about nonbinary until my late 20s.

[Lineppe'lik]

I'd wager about 18, I had a vague interest in history and discovered eunuchs and castration from their position in the Eastern Mediterranean. That coupled with my dysphoria gave me an interest in castration.

I was about 11 when I was first exposed to harmful/abusive (really bad stuff) sexual content online. I was trafficked for most of my childhood online. I was about 14 when I first understood the word eunuch in the Bible. I’ve pretty consistently wanted to be a eunuch my entire life but haven’t been able to afford it. When nonbinary became a legal gender I immediately signed up for transition surgery. I didn’t know about nonbinary until my late 20s.

Despite all that's been happening in the US I do have to say you're all very much ahead when it comes to gender. I'm sorry to hear about your childhood, if I may ask what did you mean by "I was trafficked for most of my childhood online." ?

[TightGloves]

I’ve been around veterinary surgery since I was 7. My dad’s a vet, so I basically grew up in the clinic. I remember standing in the operating room, way too small for the scrubs, watching him perform surgeries. It was fascinating—seeing the precision, the focus, the calm in the chaos. Sometimes, I got to help in tiny ways—passing tools, holding a light. Nothing major, but it felt huge at the time. Those early experiences in the OR sparked my interest for castration/neutering, since most of the time, I was helping there.

[Godson]

As a kid growing up in a livestock farm, with a revolving door of new working dogs - pretty damn young.

I recount some of this in one of my posts on castration. Best not read if squeamish…