Transitioning at work and in all of my life

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Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

Danya
kennath7 (imported) wrote: Thu May 13, 2010 11:36 am I know how frustrating a stressful things are for you right now

Other than that I am glad you are doing well and that your spirits are in a positive place

Keep up the good work , I know things will turn around for you soon I see in you that female determination in that you will not give up until you achieve your goal

I like your photos, I take many my self it helps me escape to my own world

You are such a sweetheart, kennath7. Turns out this is exactly what I needed to hear tonight. I appreciate your mentioning how frustrating and stressful things are for me at this time.

I just spoke with an Archive friend about this and related matters. I was a little concerned that folks are thinking I am just sailing through my life without a care in the world. You clearly recognize this is not the case.

Although I am doing well and my spirits are high, I have moments when I wonder how all of this will turn out. Typically, these don't last long and I get on with what I need to do and then I know everything will turn out fine.

Usually, I feel a great sense of freedom. Losing my job has turned out to be a good thing in many ways. I now have a chance to rebuild my life in a way that is more fulfilling. That includes the possibility of moving yet again to choices on what types of jobs I take. This freedom can be a little scary at times, too.

Thanks for the comment on my photos. :) I'm glad photography lets you escape to your own world. I feel the same way.

Hugs,

Danya
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I have mixed feelings about tomorrow morning's interview for the contract job. Perhaps by the time I finish writing this, I will be back on track.

What is bothering me about this? I am concerned that I will be offered the job and also concerned that I will not be. 😄 Why?

1. Unlike many technical recruiting agencies, the one handling this offers no benefits. This is fine for now, but
Danya (imported) wrote: Wed May 12, 2010 12:07 pm I need to find a permanent job,
with benefits, by the end of January, 2010. That is when my COBRA coverage runs out. Besides, the benefits offered by some agencies are not extensive.

2. If I get the job, I will be more stressed out. I will absolutely work hard at the new position. It will be critical that I continue to make a very good impression. I will also need to continue working hard on finding a permanent job while maintaining my sanity. :)

3. In my entire work history, I have never had to take a contract job. This is essentially temporary work, although there is a chance they would hire me as a permanent employee.

4. Contract workers (essentially consultants) are often not viewed by regular employees as true team members. This can make it difficult to fit in and accomplish what needs to be done.

I am working hard today preparing for the interview. This evening, I will probably go someplace to relax. That will put me in the right frame of mind for the interview.

The thing is, I really want to be offered this position. The company is trans friendly. The experience I can gain at this company would be invaluable, in part because it is a new industry for me. Some of the technology they use is also new to me but frequently used throughout companies hiring people in my field.

Having a contract job while I continue to look for permanent work puts me in a stronger position than being unemployed and seeking work. The new experience will look good on my resume, too.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I just heard that tomorrow's interview has been postponed until Monday morning at 10:00 AM. The hiring manager had a last minute meeting scheduled.

This week is the first I will be collecting 'first tier' unemployment extension of benefits paid for by the federal government. I am hopeful that within a few weeks, or less, I will have some type of job and can leave unemployment behind.

One of my contingency plans is moving to another part of the country for a job in my field of expertise. I am also considering options should I not find a job similar to what I had, although I think this is unlikely.

One of these options is to go back to graduate school, probably while working at a full-time job of some type. I could build on my chemistry background by taking graduate courses in clinical or pharmaceutical chemistry. I enjoy school, or the classes, anyway. :) At least in years past, it was relatively easy to obtain school-related work in the physical sciences as a teaching or research assistant. I could combine an assistant position with some other type of work or work full-time while doing the course work or a degree full-time. I have done this before and I was not a spring chicken then, either.

Another option is to work towards a degree in gender studies. This is a field that fascinates me. Before going this route, though, I would need to check into the marketability of such a degree. I suspect it may not be high. I am almost certain I would be unable to rely on a school for any type of assisting job for this type of degree.

If I find a job soon, I still need to think about longer term income security. How will I ensure that I always can bring in money, no matter what is happening with the economy? With a 9 to 5 job, I probably could not find enough evening courses in advanced chemistry to do me any good.
Danya (imported) wrote: Sat Jan 10, 2009 10:06 am There is the possibility of
going for an MBA degree. At this point in my career, I am not sure if this would help or harm my future prospects for employment. I have noticed job ads in my field that list a preference for applicants for MBAs. My sense is an MBA would make it easier for me to be an independent consultant.

Yet another option is to learn one or more of the latest programming languages. I have been a 'code jockey(ette) 😄 in another life, so I understand the basic principles of coding. Including object oriented programming. I continue to do database coding. I suspect I could find freelance work on projects, to start.

The economy is changing the ways companies do business, how they view employees and so on. I need to be prepared to support myself, whatever may happen down the road.

I am making an effort not to over prepare for tomorrow morning's interview. I will be ready to answer the standard types of questions while remaining relaxed enough to answer unexpected questions. The weather is supposed to be clear tomorrow. I will get up early enough to take a long walk before showering and dressing for the interview. Either the hiring manager will feel I am a good fit or not. If not, another opportunity will come along soon.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

As I noted in my last post, my interview at the local health care industry was postponed until Monday. My electrologist assured me, via email, that she would keep this in mind at our Sunday afternoon appointment. 😄 Meaning, she will use less current in the treatment so I will have less obvious redness by Monday morning. I hope!

I am not sitting around waiting to be offered the contract job. Since late this afternoon into late this evening, I have applied at a number of recruiting agencies, indicating I am willing to move to the locations I listed. I want to point out that for most of these, I would be moving at my own expense. Most of the rest of the day I spent preparing for the interview that will not happen now until next week.

My close Twin Cities friend would view one of these consulting firms as another manifestation of the 'evil empire.' :) I do not think she would go quite this far. They are rated highly as a place to work. I would work directly for this firm, traveling to different client sites as needed. They provide excellent benefits. I like to travel, although I realize constant travel for a job can be very tiring.

Last night, I went to see "Iron Man 2." It was not as entertaining as the original, but it got me out of the house and to my first movie in many months.

When I returned to my car after the show, I unlocked the door and got in. I noticed that, on this chilly night, the car seemed nice and toasty. :) Turns out I had left it running with my other set of keys in the ignition. 😄 A friend noted, somewhat ominously, "You'll find this happening more frequently as you get older." 😄

I responded that I have always tended to be preoccupied with thoughts that have little to do with what my body may be doing. When I was married, my ex-wife would try to drag me back to the 'real' world, saying "earth to (that name I used to go by)." She always thought I had my head in the clouds. It is likely my friend is also correct, though. I am definitely getting older.

Anyway, I was certainly preoccupied as I arrived at the theater. I keep trying to come up with new ways to find a job and alternative jobs. I was also listening to the Prelude to Act I of Die Meistersinger von Nurnburg. I suspect this was contributing to my distraction. :) For some reason, and even though this is Wagner's sole comic opera (or music drama), when I hear this prelude I feel that I am naked and the music is rolling over and caressing my body. I know, this may be TMI! 😄

So when my naked body is being caressed by insubstantial but powerful music while I am thinking about my life options, I tend to be just a little distracted.

Speaking of bodies, I finally seem to be noticing some enhanced breast growth long promised by my new HRT doctor. I even went out today, for the first time....well, never mind. I do not want to give out all of my secrets. :)

Then there is my hair. I am not sure Erica Ann knows this, although she was one of the instigators of this change. At least indirectly. Until two months ago, I always kept my own hair very short so wearing a wig would be as comfortable, and cool, as possible. Now that it is growing out, I am also dyeing it to match the wig color fairly closely.

This serves two purposes. It prevents stray gray hair from showing along the edges of the wig. My electrologist also assured me that this was the way to go in case I ever get into an intimate situation. Like that's going to happen. 😄 Anyway, I would not want to shock some unsuspecting partner by revealing gray hair under a dark auburn wig.

Now that my hair has grown a bit, I think I will be able to go without a wig at some point. There are ways, known only to women :), to get this to look realistic even with a somewhat receding hairline. Anyway, lots of natal women have thinning hair. Mine is still reasonably thick over nearly all of my head.

I am so tired from this job search that I am going to take tomorrow off. Recruiters now have my cell number should they need to reach me. I will go to the Chicago Botanic Garden in the morning. I am still discovering new areas there. Last time, I found this very cool model train railroad garden. Unforuntately, I need to see my gender therapist in the afternoon and pay her not only for the visit but for a generic 'safe passage' letter.

Friday evening, I will go to Hunters nightclub
Danya (imported) wrote: Thu Nov 19, 2009 12:04 pm for the first time in many weeks.

I'll work again Saturday.

Finally, thanks to the folks who keep this site running. I was feeling stressed out when I started writing this post and I am more relaxed now.
mrt (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by mrt (imported) »

Programming or Gender studies? I think both are very interesting topics. I'm curious what you would do once you completed a course in gender?

As to software what were you thinking? I've decided to get off my rear and take a few day classes (One day things) from some parts vendors to kind of update me to where things are. The problem is they have 5 different sub topics and I find that to do what I'm interested in would take 4 of me to do them all and sadly they don't have anyway for you to complete more then one. So, I'm mixing and matching and hope to get something out of it.

If you did move back into chemistry etc maybe you could work on HRT type things? That would be of GREAT interest to many of your friends (cough - ME) who would like more science involved in the dose, half lives etc of the stuff being sold. I did a spread sheet program using the "official" and "reported" half lives of several Testosterone treatments to try to understand why what I've been taking seems to work (or not) and shared that with some UK friends using a (so called) longer lasting ester. Sheesh!!! Too much "art" not enough "Science" in my amateur opinion but??? I could easily be wrong.

Congrats on the new hormone program producing better results. Your picking an interesting time in your life to go through puberty! ;)

Memory and such I think are an indication that your wired fully female! So congrats on that and ahh (cough) good luck! *Finding your keys etc.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

mrt (imported) wrote: Sat May 15, 2010 4:36 am Programming or Gender studies? I think both are very interesting topics. I'm curious what you would do once you completed a course in gender?

This is a very good question. For now, I don't have the answer other than teach.
mrt (imported) wrote: Sat May 15, 2010 4:36 am As to software what were you thinking? I've decided to get off my rear and take a few day classes (One day things) from some parts vendors to kind of update me to where things are. The problem is they have 5 different sub topics and I find that to do what I'm interested in would take 4 of me to do them all and sadly they don't have anyway for you to complete more then one. So, I'm mixing and matching and hope to get something out of it.

In part because some of the jobs I am looking at want these specific skills, I would consider C# and ASP.net. Maybe I would also look at VB.net. I am already pretty adept at writing complex SQL queries, another skill some of these places want.
mrt (imported) wrote: Sat May 15, 2010 4:36 am If you did move back into chemistry etc maybe you could work on HRT type things? That would be of GREAT interest to many of your friends (cough - ME) who would like more science involved in the dose, half lives etc of the stuff being sold. I did a spread sheet program using the "official" and "reported" half lives of several Testosterone treatments to try to understand why what I've been taking seems to work (or not) and shared that with some UK friends using a (so called) longer lasting ester. Sheesh!!! Too much "art" not enough "Science" in my amateur opinion but??? I could easily be wrong.

The chemistry part is probably something I will not pursue, at least not to reenter the field as a lab scientist. My gender therapist came up with an interesting idea this afternoon that would use my science background. I'll write about that in another post.
mrt (imported) wrote: Sat May 15, 2010 4:36 am Congrats on the new hormone program producing better results. Your picking an interesting time in your life to go through puberty! ;)
I was already going through puberty. :) Now things may get even more interesting. 😄
mrt (imported) wrote: Sat May 15, 2010 4:36 am Memory and such I think are an indication that your wired fully female! So congrats on that and ahh (cough) good luck! *Finding your keys etc.

Although I have no reason to think your explanation is better that my other friends "you are getting older," I prefer yours. :)
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I may very well have a second interview next week. While I was out for an appointment with my gender therapist, a recruiter called about a permanent position nearby that he thought I would be perfect for. Although I did not get back home until nearly 7 PM, I called him and left a message saying I am very interested.

After working until 1 AM last night on my job search, I needed to get out this morning. The wind convinced me the botanic garden was not a good option. Instead, I went to Brookfield Zoo choosing it because it is not too far from my therapist's office. I visited the zoo in the summer of 1973 and I do no think it has changed much since. I decided I have seen enough zoos to last me the rest of my life. There are a few I would go back to.

After speaking with my therapist for 30 minutes, I didn't have anything else to say. I had already told her of my plan to have GRS
Danya (imported) wrote: Sun May 09, 2010 11:49 am within the next 12 - 18 months.
She was pleased with this. I asked "How much time do we have left?" She told me 30 minutes and asked if I had a reason to leave early. That would have been nice, with the heavy traffic on I-355 made even worse by construction and closed lanes. Instead, I started talking about all kinds of things in my life and what is important to me. She suggested that I become and advocate for the environment, speak to younger school children about this (who she thinks are not exposed to enough science) and possibly try something I decided not to do years ago. Get involved as director, or perhaps assistant director, of a non-profit group working on environmental issues. When I finished my masters degree, I was offered just such an opportunity.

This has a lot of appeal to me. On the drive home, I was in tears. Crying is usually a good thing with me and it was today. I felt my therapist had picked up on something important to me without my pointing it out to her. Of course, she is trained to do this. I was still a little surprised because today was the only time I have spoken in depth about science, the environment, what is happening to our planet, the need for more public knowledge of how science works and what it can and cannot do, and so on.

In an ideal world, not only would I be who I was always meant to be in a gender sense. I would also have the rest of my life in line with my values and passions. Although information technology work is something I can do well and enjoy to an extent, it most definitely is not a passion.

Over the weekend, I will do some preliminary investigation on the feasibility of my therapist's suggestion. There are so many things I would like to do with my life. I cannot possibly get to all of them.

I do not need a potential job as director of a non-profit to pay close to what I am used to making. If it lets me work on something I consider a critical issue and that I can address with knowledge and insight, I would be happy as long as I make enough to live off and have some fun.

I realize, too, that I like nice clothes although I do not need a large living space. Yesterday, I found a gorgeous dress at Lord & Taylor. I got so far as taking it off the rack. Then I put it back with no regrets. The price tag of $180 made this a very easy decision. I only very rarely buy any clothing now, but I am sure I will get some new things when I have a job. I have never had enough warm weather clothing.

Back to the IT area. I have expanded my list of acceptable cities for a move to include Los Angeles. I like parts of the LA area, but it is not one of my favorite cities. I also added San Diego to the list.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

Earlier today, I started to feel uneasy about the contract job interview on Monday. I could not figure out why, but I did not sit around and mop about it. I went to the Chicago Botanic Garden.

Some late season tulips, and even a few daffodils, are still in bloom. Every time I visit, there are new species and varieties of plants that have blossomed. Perhaps this is the reason I prefer a botanical garden over a zoo. Most zoos only occasionally have infant animals on view and it seems rare that they have a new species.

By the time I returned home, I realized what was bothering me about Monday's interview. I had put in over 24 hours preparing preliminary materials and getting ready for the interview I had downtown about a month ago. I was very well prepared and calm during my time with the hiring manager. I still did not get the job. I knew that I did not have 24 hours to prepare for my new interview, so in the back of my mind I felt there was no way I could succeed with the new hiring manager. I tend to set very high standards for myself that I cannot always meet.

Once I realized what was going on in my head, I was able to let go of my concerns. I do not need to prepare for more than a few hours. I fully expect that the interview will go well.

I am still hoping that
Danya (imported) wrote: Fri May 07, 2010 7:08 am I will have an interview for a permanent
job on Tuesday.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

Less than an hour ago, I returned home from my electrolysis appointment. My electrologist told me that, because of the intense work she has been doing, I am at about the point that others typically reach at 6 months. This is very good news. I need to keep ice on my face all evening so that swelling and red spots, already low, are not easily detectable at my interview in the morning.
Danya (imported) wrote: Wed Apr 14, 2010 11:36 am I am feeling very upbeat about t
he interview. From what my Minnesota friend tells me, it is likely I will be offered this contract job. She has worked a number of contract jobs. By the time things get to the interview phase, the employer is likely to go with you. Should this not happen, I will be fine and know something else will work out soon.

After considering my life direction and where I want to be, I concluded that a contract job may be better than a permanent one right now. This could make it easy for me to fit in GRS in less than a year. Perhaps much less.

At this point, I do not know what will happen but I expect to soon.

Now I need to get back to preparing for tomorrow's interview.
NaziNuts (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by NaziNuts (imported) »

The Great Danya is destined to win all interviews and all outerviews.

Go Girl!

- NN
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

NaziNuts (imported) wrote: Mon May 17, 2010 12:01 pm The Great Danya is destined to win all interviews and all outerviews.

Go Girl!

- NN

Hi NN,

So far, I feel I have always won at interviews. I have gone in and done what I needed to do to convince hiring managers that I am the right person for the job. This does not mean they always agree. 😄

I appreciate your kind words. It's good to hear from you. :)

Hugs,

Danya
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I am now very well prepared
Danya (imported) wrote: Fri May 14, 2010 8:23 am for tomorrow morning's interview. I
'm also very psyched.

After the interview, I will call the recruiter for the permanent job opportunity that he says is a terrific fit. After looking at the job description, I agree. The company is interviewing now. In case I am asked to go to this second interview Monday afternoon, I have gotten my 'leave behind' package ready. This includes my resume, my portfolio, list of references and business card in a dark green, translucent folder.

I just got contacted, again, by Argonne National Laboratory, in suburban Chicago, for a post-doc position. They got my information from the State of Illinois job bank, so they know how many years of experience I have at the doctoral level in chemistry. They also know about my degree in Botany/Ecology. What they do not know is that it has been 11 years since I worked in this field. They also do not know that I worked at the lab decades ago during the summer after I graduated from college. :) Back then, I was studying the effects of radiation on the respiration of pine trees. A very unscientifically stated conclusion of this work is that pine trees do not like ionizing radiation, although they can adapt to some extent to survive.

The pay for this post-doc position is close to what I was making at my last IT job. Although I think it is very unlikely they will still be interested once they know I have been out of chemistry for so long, I figure 'What the heck.' I am going to apply anyway. If by some chance I get this, it would be a great way to get back into chemistry research.

I decided that the Fermi National Accelerator Laboratory, also in suburban Chicago, is too far outside my areas of expertise to investigate. 😄 Although I did take numerous physics courses in college for the fun of it. Including quantum mechanics and particle physics. That was many years ago, in an alternate universe. 😄

More seriously, though, it will not hurt for me to try to get science related work at either of these national laboratories. It might not be at the doctoral level, at least for now, but it would be fascinating work.

I cannot wait for tomorrow. :) Whatever the outcome, it will be a good day.
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by EricaAnn (imported) »

Danya (imported) wrote: Mon May 17, 2010 9:41 am After considering my life direction and where I want to be, I concluded that a contract job may be better than a permanent one right now. This could make it easy for me to fit in GRS in less than a year. Perhaps much less.

Hi Danya,

If this is indeed your plan, you are going to need select and contact a GRS surgeon almost immediately.

This means that you're going to have to do your research, select a surgeon, contact them and make your monetary deposit with them in the next week or so.

They are typically very busy. For example, Dr. Bowers, is usually about a year out from the time your deposit money is received in her office.
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Mon May 17, 2010 1:05 pm Hi Danya,

If this is indeed your plan, you are going to need select and contact a GRS surgeon almost immediately.

This means that you're going to have to do your research, select a surgeon, contact them and make your monetary deposit with them in the next week or so.

They are typically very busy. For example, Dr. Bowers, is usually about a year out from the time your deposit money is received in her office.

Hi Erica Ann,

It is most definitely my plan. I will start contacting surgeons this week, after doing just a bit more research. The length of time needed to get surgery set up with Marci Bowers is one of the reasons I may not go with her. A question I will ask of all of them is what kind of time frame are we looking at. I know it will be months with any of them that I am considering.

Hugs,

Danya
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

It is a little after 11 PM, and a recruiter just contacted me about another job opportunity. One of these will work out.

Please see, if you care to, my more informative first and second installments of tonight's posts. :)

Now I will get to bed to get a good night's rest for tomorrow's adventures.
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I was very pleased with the way my morning interview went. The hiring manager told me that, out of all the people he has interviewed, I was the first to be able to list and explain the steps in a certain development methodology. Despite the fact that others listed this on their resumes.

When I showed him my portfolio, he said 'Wow!' He also commented that he was surprised how many people could not use the software I used to create it. Thanks to Kristoff for passing along the advice to put this together.

I felt very comfortable with the parts of the office environment I saw, and with the much younger hiring manager.

The company is supposed to check references this afternoon and let me know if they want me by Friday. I spoke with the recruiter after the interview and she said this company typically moves slowly.

While I was out, the recruiter for the urgent permanent job opening left a message. I returned his call but got his voicemail. So it is still very possible that I will interview for this opportunity.
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

Tonight, I feel like I am at the end of my rope. I have been dealing with recruiters much of the day and applying for a number of jobs until late this evening. The thing is, even if there is a very promising possibility of a job you cannot rest. I have to keep up my job search until I am offered a position. And if it is contract work, I will still have to keep up this search.

I am willing to do whatever is necessary to land a job, including options such as moving again and taking a job that requires a lot of travel. But I am worn out right now.
Danya (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:21 am I have too many things on my mind and
not enough answers.

A nearby therapist that I occasionally see is married. Her husband has been unemployed for over a year. She says that if someone could tell her that her husband would be working again in eight months, for instance, she could handle things much better. At least the uncertainty of endless applications, financial stress and so on would have a known end. She and her husband would be able to plan their life again. It is this uncertainty that is bugging me tonight.

Nonetheless, and in a way I did not expect, the many kind member posts on this thread give me added strength. I am more thankful for these than I can express - at least tonight! :)

I debated awhile before writing this. Because I have always been very open here, I wanted to share a little bit of this down time, too. Life is, at times, extremely difficult. But I never give up. I did not give up during chemotherapy or when I was assaulted and nearly killed. I am not about to give up now.

My attitude is almost always upbeat and I am sure I will get back to that good place soon. I know that I will get everything to work. I just wish I had some clue as to the 'when' of all these things.

Tuesday morning, I have an interview with a recruiter about the permanent position I have written about. He has other opportunities coming up more frequently as the months go by, and the recession that remains (at least for those without work) becomes less severe.

The recruiter asked me if I know where Schaumburg is, his office location. I responded "Certainly, I have been to Woodfield Mall and several other establishments there." He jokingly replied that I could go shopping after our appointment.

Interacting with recruiters and hiring managers is refreshing. I feel like, once again, I am part of the working world of business. At least some people are interested in what I can do to help companies succeed, even if only in a
Danya (imported) wrote: Tue Apr 27, 2010 12:16 pm small way.

Instead of shoppin
g tomorrow, I will get my Illinois drivers license. I have five facilities that have been recommended to me as being friendly to TG persons. I want that 'F' on my license. :) Letters from my hormone doctor and gender therapist will likely do the trick.

I now have one of those Bluetooth gizmos for my cell phone. This way, if I am not at home, recruiters can call me and I can answer easily even while driving.
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by EricaAnn (imported) »

Danya (imported) wrote: Tue May 18, 2010 2:22 pm Tonight, I feel like I am at the end of my rope. I have been dealing with recruiters much of the day and applying for a number of jobs until late this evening. The thing is, even if there is a very promising possibility of a job you cannot rest. I have to keep up my job search until I am offered a position. And if it is contract work, I will still have to keep up this search.

I am willing to do whatever is necessary to land a job, including options such as moving again and taking a job that requires a lot of travel. But I am worn out right now.
Danya (imported) wrote: Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:21 am I have too many things on my mind and
not enough answers.

Hang in there girl and keep trying. It's about all you can do. Pers
Danya (imported) wrote: Tue May 18, 2010 2:22 pm everance will eventual
Danya (imported) wrote: Tue Apr 27, 2010 12:16 pm ly pay off.

Instead of shoppin
g tomorrow, I will get my Illinois drivers license. I have five facilities that have been recommended to me as being friendly to TG persons. I want
that 'F' on my license. Letters from my hormone doctor and gender therapist will likely do the trick.

It sounds like you have all the documentation you'll need to get this accomplished today. Just smile pretty for that new photo on your license! :)

BTW, I did pass along your name and phone number to the individual we spoke about on Sunday via e-mail last night. I did receive an e-mail back from him thanking me for the information and stating that he was going to call you. He would appear to be interested in you, so good luck.

I was also wondering if you stopped by Mr. Beef on Sunday and if you did, did you enjoy it?
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Wed May 19, 2010 12:51 am Hang in there girl and keep trying. It's about all you can do. Pers
everance will eventually pay off.

Hi Erica Ann,

You are such a sweetie and I am fortunate to have met you. Even better, we have spent many fun times together and I have gotten to know more about you.

I'm doing better today. As I got in bed last night, I realized much of what was bothering me was the possibility of running all over the metro region for my drivers license. And then not succeeding in the end. More below :)
EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Wed May 19, 2010 12:51 am It sounds like you have all the documentation you'll need to get this accomplished today. Just smile pretty for that new photo on your license! :)

After my morning interveiw, which I will discuss in another post, I drove to the state office building downtown. I have not been inside this sleek, ultramodern wonder in years. On the lower level concourse, they have a drivers license bureau. A friend said this office is 'friendly' to folks like 'us.'

I stepped up to the woman at the check in counter, presented my documents and gave a brief explanation of my situation. She said I would have to see a supervisor. I managed to stay calm. 😄 At least I would get a chance to speak with him or her. This was very unlike my experience in the north suburban licensing office.

One of the supervisor's first questions was "who sent you here?" I gave him what must have looked like a blank stare. For a moment, I thought he might have meant my physician or a friend had recommended their office. Or a secret agent type trans friend. 😄 I finally said "The woman at the front desk."

I had all my documentation to show him. Including l
EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Wed May 19, 2010 12:51 am
Danya (imported) wrote: Tue May 18, 2010 2:22 pm etters
from my hormone doctor and gender therapist.
I also took along the court order for my legal name change. He took a lot of notes and checked some things in his computer. :)

At one point he said "So you are in the process of becoming Danya." I answered "I am Danya."

The end result is that I got my gender listed as "Female" on my new I
EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Wed May 19, 2010 12:51 am llinois Drivers License. :) This makes me very happy.

BTW, I did pass along your name and phone number to the individual we spoke about on Sunday via e-mail last night. I did receive an e-mail back from him thanking me for the information and stating that he was going to call you. He
would appear to be interested in you, so good luck.

Mr. 'X' left a message while I was out today. He sounds very nice and would like to take me to dinner or spend time some place just talking. He said that he found me interesting and fascinating. :) I'm glad someone doe
EricaAnn (imported) wrote: Wed May 19, 2010 12:51 am s! 😄 This is exactly the type of thing I like to hear.

I was also wondering if you stopped by
Mr. Beef on Sunday and if you did, did you enjoy it?

There are so many stores along that street, Erica Ann, that I did not find it. I wasn't really trying very hard, though. I will try it sometime soon.

My next electrolysis appointment is Friday morning at 8 AM. Yikes! Is Mr. Beef open for breakfast?? :) 'C' assured me that my face will be presentable by Friday evening.

Hugs,

Danya
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I returned Mr. 'X''s phone call and he suggested going to dinner tomorrow evening. He wanted to come up my way and, possibly, 'pick me up' literally to drive me to the restaurant. I told him I would be glad to meet him some place.

Then I mentioned that I planned on going to a movie tonight. I need to unwind in a bad way. I am burned out. He will meet me at the movie theater later this evening. :)

He told me that the sleek, ultramodern state government building that I like so much is almost universally hated by the locals. Oh well. 😄

My morning interview with the new recruiter went very well. He is the most professional recruiter I have worked with so far. He really seems to know what he is doing and is knowledgeable in the basics of my career background.

He will submit my resume to a large bank downtown that has its IT offices in the Sears Tower. I think this job is a long shot for me, but it is worth a try. This is a permanent position and I would get four weeks of vacation my first year. The bank also covers GRS.

As we discussed this opportunity, he agreed with some ideas I have about the direction of my career. I also got an idea for how to improve my skills for similar IT jobs in the financial industry. The position description sounds interesting and challenging, two things I look for.

A corporate recruiter wants to set up a phone
Danya (imported) wrote: Fri May 07, 2010 7:08 am interview for a permanent position
I applied for at around 11 PM last night. Cool!
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

Instead of seeing a movie, 'X' and I had dinner at a small Italian restaurant. I drove so we left his car parked at the theater. Although I offered to pay my own way, he insisted on picking up the tab.

I had a terrific time. 'X' opened doors for me, he took off my light coat when we were taken to our table. He is charming and I enjoyed our conversation. We spoke, very briefly, about Planck's constant and its part in an energy equation less well known than Einstein's. 😄 We talked about all kinds of interesting things. He, at least half jokingly, said he was trying to seduce me with interesting conversation. Yup. That just might do it. Or play a part. :)

I asked him to tell me all kinds of things about himself, his life and interests. He shared quite a bit, including his love of Frank Sinatra's songs. As we drove back to his car, he sang one of Sinatra's songs to me.

He told me how sweet I am. I responded that he must tell that to all the girls. He replied "This time I mean it." Maybe. I am not convinced at this point. We both had an enjoyable time and I felt very safe with him. I am content with that much. I am also keeping in mind that, for now, I am in an emotionally vulnerable position.

I will see him tomorrow afternoon when we will spend time at the Chicago Botanic Garden. I'm putting in time on my job search tonight and will continue tomorrow morning and tomorrow night.

Tonight's date with 'X' was a very nice break and I feel less stressed.
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

I had a terrific time with 'X' today, a very special day for me under any circumstances. We had intended to go to the Chicago Botanic Garden but, as I was driving to his place I realized what a long trek it would be back to the Garden. Instead, we went downtown. The day was perfect, with totally clear skies and warm temperatures.

We both had our cameras. He asked someone to take our picture in front of Buckingham Fountain. We walked a long way and saw some things most tourists would not know about.

He treated me to dinner at an inexpensive downtown restaurant. Toward the end of the meal, he asked me to sit next to him. He showed me pictures of his family. Then things heated up a bit, as they did several times later in the evening. :) I felt like I was a teen again, only this time it was a wonderful experience. That's all the detail I will give. ;) Whether or not things develop any further, I enjoy the time we share.

I have been keeping up with job applications, applying for eight this morning and I will complete several more this evening.
John (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by John (imported) »

Hi my Friend!

I will continue to keep my fingers crossed for you in both cases!

Greetings

John
butterflyjack (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by butterflyjack (imported) »

Hi Danya...I must commend you on your stick-to-itiveness (if that's a word).

I'm glad I don't have to go through what you are... It's so good to see you have attracted a man who obviously wants to be with you...You left a fill in the blank space in your last message...It would be interesting to know what that was? smooches dragonfly
Danya (imported)
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Re: Transitioning at work and in all of my life

Post by Danya (imported) »

John (imported) wrote: Fri May 21, 2010 1:09 am Hi my Friend!

I will continue to keep my fingers crossed for you in both cases!

Greetings

John

Hi John,

[quote="Da
Danya (imported) wrote: Sat Mar 14, 2009 11:31 am nya (imported)" time=1215532200]
It's
always good to hear from you.
[/quote]
I appreciate all help, including your crossed fingers. :)

Hugs,

Danya
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